Pound for pound

I have been pounding the laptop keyboard instead of the pavement.  Something in the back of my mind keeps trying to tell me that I should be out there running.  It is trying to make me feel like I am guilty or failing or not doing the right thing by not pushing myself to go out and run even when the weather has made it so uncomfortable for me.  I have been putting that thought to the back of my mind because I am stubbornly going forward with my committment to keeping the things I want to do fun.
I can weigh the negatives of missing a workout.  I can list them as my mind tells me to do it no matter what I feel.  I am not being consistent, I will lose what I've worked hard for,  I will have to go back and find my foundation again.  It circles round and round in my brain endlessly adding new and more reasons to the loop.   And yes.  All of those things are true and real.  But what good is keeping up with myself if I start to feel miserable about having to do it?
I haven't let it reach that point.  I am not miserable but I know I have some catching up to do.
The difference is that I am truly anxious to start back when my time is right.  I am looking forward to being able to have consistent workouts in a week.  I am looking forward to that feeling of reaching 5, 10, 14 miles again.  Those are feelings and accomplishments I can experience all over again when I am in that joyful state of mind.  I can see myself doing it again.  Then I will be able to commit to the work and have the fun I deserve when I do it.  Guilt and failure are not in the equation.  The right thing now is the self-recognition and realization that I have the discipline and strength to be able to go back to it and have fun when I am ready.  It will be soon, I think.  At least better than the last few weeks.  Besides, it isn't like I haven't been pounding something.  30,015 words so far.
TT