Meet for coffee?

The day starts a little later when you don't have to rush off to work.

I have an appointment at 8:45am this morning so I took the opportunity to give myself a vacation day and a long weekend. I have the day off once I fulfill my scheduled engagement. Can you call a routine doctors appoint an engagement? I just did. And I also used it as a reason for not showing up to work so it sounds good to me.

I might stop off for coffee on my way home. I think that sounds like a fun and quiet way to spend a few moments. You can picture it. Ordering a simple black coffee so you don't have to wait around until someone else mixes it up and calls your name when it's ready. It's an easy order, pay, and find a small table in a less traffic area of the cramped room. Sit and breathe it all in. Pull out your eReader and figure out how the author went from sugar-sweet nice to beasty mean. You have to keep reading to see how it all flows together or check back to see if it's a writing team instead of one author that has different writing styles. But the moment isn't lost and the alone time surrounded by others feels pretty okay on a Friday mid-morning.

I might take that time to figure out the rest of the day or just leave it to chance. Either way I don't have to think about that now.
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Boring Weather

We could talk about the weather.

This happens more in winter than any other time of the year. It's due to the fact that I don't care for it - the colder temperatures, the rain mixed with wind, the overall feeling I might not make it from the house to my car without losing a few fingers to hypothermia. Okay, that might be a little drastic but you get the general idea of how little this season means to me or should I say how much? I sure talk more about it more than any other season but then I hear others giving summer a bad rap. I guess it's all fair play although boring.

Give it a minute, it will change. Be open to the different experiences it can provide. If you know the run in the winter is going to cause all the unpleasantness I could possibly imagine than find another way to go for a run. There are other options. And thinking about the other options can give another perspective on how you look at that same thing. Change the camera angle and you'll get a different picture of the same landscape. It might even get you to think of the same things in a way you hadn't thought about before.

Then it isn't boring.
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Agitated Stillness

What would life be without a thought in your head? Empty-headed. Devoid of thought. Still.

I'm not sure if that sounds all that good. I read an article about finding your stillness. The theme of the article is when things start spinning in our heads we should pause, sit back, settle into what is happening and work with what we are thinking. The article said to concentrate on what was causing the thoughts, access how they are making us feel, calmly let them sit inside us. It suggested to face what we are thinking at that moment and find some gratitude and compassion and then give yourself permission to go back to your day to day.

Yikes. That is a whole lot of thinking. It sounds pretty counter-intuitive to think so much if what you are trying to do is settle down and clear your head. Why not just pause and stop. Why all the self analysis. Do I need to have a list of things I need to think about when I'm thinking so hard I can't stop thinking? How am I supposed to remember the steps and what am I to think about next when I already have too many things to think about.

I thought this pausing, calming, meditation type thing is supposed to be less imposing. It sounds like a lot of work to me and I don't think I can remember all the things I'm supposed to think about when I do it. That could cause even more anxiety over all the things I'm already thinking.

If I want to clear my head I think I will just take a break. I will distract myself with something else, take on a different chore, go for a run. Don't think so hard. That seems to be an easier mantra to remember when there is too much going on in my head.
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Make it bold

Don't blink twice or this month might be over. I've been marking little forward slashes across the numbers of the calendar and it looks like it's picked up a rhythm. Some slashes started out small but as we march along through the month they have become progressively larger and bolder.

Can't do anything about those days with the slashes. Can't look back and don't have the time to wonder what I did with them. I can work with the ones still to come and concentrate on today. I can do what I can with right now and work on it to make those slashes bold today so I'm not thinking about yesterday. Besides.

It will all be filled if you blink...twice.

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Blowing hard

The winds of yesterday have slowed.

No really. It was blowing hard all day yesterday. You could go outside but it was pretty uncomfortable being out there with all the wind. It never let up. I heard it howling it's way in the night before and it stayed the day. It was persistent and kept right on blowing the entire time.

I think it's all done now. I don't hear the whistling and rustling of the tree branches as they bounce and swat against each other. It's a normal Monday morning with no sounds other than what you would expect to hear on a Monday morning. The winds have stilled. Time to pull out the old routine.
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Weekly recap

Here is the lesson from this past week. 

It seems that no matter how well you brainstorm ideas to spend a productive batch of time it will naturally be taken over by life. Some priorities will be pushed aside no matter what you have going on. The key is to ride it on through because different things can happen if you don't try to hold any course too tightly.

There was certainly no pressure on the holiday where extra time was spent doing whatever came to mind. I did fill extra batches of time doing something I hadn't done before. There were some things I might not have wished to do but then, I guess, you have to be careful what you wish for.

I know I've heard that said before. Is planning another form of wishing?

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P, p, and p

I didn't exactly kick-start a new routine. It was slightly altered naturally by having my car in the shop for the entirety of the work week. Parts, promises, and paying utterly astonishing amounts to do about half the work was the frustrating name of the game. The routine changes were the rides I had to arrange and scheduling that needed to be done to get me from point A to point B without the aid of my own vehicle.

It's done. Well, half of it, but the important parts are done. The want-to-have-done's aren't that important and can wait until I've settled myself down and no longer feel as if I've overstepped my welcome on securing a ride.

So now I have my car back and I have the weekend. Everything is back in balance, including the checkbook. It's time to get down to some serious free time activity.
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Less Boredom

Brainstorming. A process of making a list of ideas to solve a problem.

I should be good at this. I make lists all the time! I used to make lists for all the many things I had to do to keep them in priority order. Now it's more a tool so I don't forget to do the things that are important. Either way, I guess I could use a little brainstorming session to come up with some creative ideas of how to break up a mundane routine. I need to come up with a list of things to do after work so I don't continually waste hour blocks of time. And some kind of fun should be involved since it is my after-hours. That shouldn't be too hard since my ideas of fun don't always match up to the normal ideas of fun. Sometimes my fun might be considered work by others but it's all in the perspective. It should be a no brainer and I could have an enormous list of items in no time at all.

I can get into this process. I can solve that problem, err, except it isn't really a problem. Is not knowing what to do with your extra time after your boring routine a problem? It is if you continue to be bored.
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Easy going Holiday

A holiday is a good day to take it easy. It gives you time to think but mostly I slept late, puttered around the house, read a little. I had some breakfast and didn't do very much.

I gathered up all my bits of yarn. It's mostly left-over portions of skeins from other projects that are finished but I had some yarn remaining. Those - I got all those smallish bits of different colored balls of yarn together and started crocheting them all together. It's all random. The colors, the stitches, the order and when I run out of one I tie it off with another and I will continue until they are all gone and I can see some sort of many colored finished product.

I guess I'm tying together a bunch of loose ends.
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Last Weeks Recap

I've gone though my posts for last week and the general consensus seems to be I'm preoccupied with the future. Plan this and plan that...don't take a day off to do nothing because it isn't in the plan. If I'm not careful the things I do now won't add up to the resounding plan I have for the finale that has built itself in my mind if I don't stay on track. That is even if I know it won't turn out as imagined no matter what I do (or plan). I also reused words like overlay and hum-drum. It's been quite a week!

I do think it's a good idea to change things up a little. The routine is a little worn and could use some revitalizing. I'm making efforts to not be so boring. I baked cinnamon rolls from scratch yesterday afternoon and that was something I hadn't done in many years and it wasn't planned. They came out pretty well and it seems I can still bake.

Maybe baking cinnamon rolls is still boring but at least it was different. It made the house smell wonderful and it's a start in a new direction of wherever it's supposed to go or not go. If it can lead me on to something that will spark another idea of different and various things to do in my present instead of waiting around for an unknown future then it's a good thing.

And I'll try to avoid using the words overlay and hum-drum.
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Ideas for Change?

I need to shake things up (again). It's time to change a few routines that can be changed. The time for a few slight adjustments to the mundane routines are in order.

I've become so focused on my crusade to get my business in order that now it's well on its way I've become stagnant. Hum-drum is the name of my game lately and that needs to change even if it is only a slight shift in what I do. How predictable can one person be? How far can I take my adherence to my everyday routines? If someone was watching my daily life they would be able to plot my path with tremendous accuracy since I never waver or shift. You would be able to overlay any day in my life and that day would match up exactly to any other random day. I don't have to worry about anyone charting my days but maybe it's time to shake it up even if just a little. 

That means I need to come up with new ideas on how to change things around and that might take a while. Let me think about it as I go off to my regular routine.

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Get the blinker to work

I finally made that appointment to take my car in for service. It has been suffering from some minor clinks and misses for a while. Nothing that causes anything but a little grief and aggravation but not enough to make any real difference. The service will be mostly time consuming because it will mean pulling out the dash to get to the radio and a/c controls that don't seem to do what they are meant to do. I also need the blinker to actually stop after I make a turn and not wait for me to manually stop it. I've gotten used to doing it but I'd rather get the car back up to it's regular standards of convenience again.

I don't know what caused me to wait so long to finally call to bring it in but it's all marked in the books for Tuesday morning. I've made all the arrangements. I guess I was going back and forth about whether I should keep the car or make a change at this point. I'm taking all these decisions too much to heart as if they will foil everything if I make the wrong move. It won't but somehow making an appointment for service on the car was something I needed to ponder. Not really.

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Predicting the Future

My mind was wandering off into some future that might never happen. I'm sure some of the parameters might be slightly accurate but there isn't any way thinking off into a very distant future can be any where near accurate the way it is imagined. The area might be the same, the walls, the furnishings but to try to place what the situation will be and how others will act in that timeframe is no way predictable.

It's a wonder all these goals and resolutions are put into place year after year by so many that haven't been able to do these things when they try over and again. What's the deal with continually trying to do something that continually doesn't work. Is the blame with the goal or resolution or the person that keeps attempting the same thing the same way.

When my mind was wandering it had nothing to do with goals and resolutions. It's funny how it turned into that conversation at all. It was an easy way to make another point about trying to predict how things will be when you have not the slightest idea. The future is out there and I keep trying to pinpoint it. No go. Not gonna happen. Stay right here where you are today, do what you can, and the future will come when you are ready or not.
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Empty complaints

It's hard to believe while in the middle of everyday routines that things could be so good. While I stumble through the hum-drum daily get up and follow all the familiar steps that are retraced day after day it's not easy to remember how very good things have turned out. There isn't really a complaint that could be spoken that would carry any weight due to the mere lack of substance it could contain. It's empty. An empty complaint.

I've actually worried about when to take my car in for service. This day or that. When and what time. What would work out the best. Now, you know things have gotten too good when you are not worried about what might be wrong with the car or how much it will take to fix or what that will mean as far as keeping or getting a new. The only worry is when to take it in?

Empty complaints. 

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Fun over Fear

It turns out I somehow missed yesterday. I must have been in massive hibernation because it was one day I can say was a blank, a miss, a didn't take the time to even try to do a thing day. Nothing was accomplished, nothing could be checked off any list, and there isn't any sign of anything happening other than, well, nothing. Is this what taking a day off might really mean?

Depending on what article of fake news you would like to read, what happened could be observed as the absolute wrong way to observe the new year and all the wonderful things you think you need to change about yourself. Those improvements won't happen unless you pay stringent attention to the rules. There is no such thing as a hibernation day, even if it falls on a Sunday and is one of the coldest day of the year. You must stick to the plan!

It might help in these articles if they were at least credible. You could overlay each one, all written by different experts, and see they are all the same. Not one offers anything different or creative. They are all stoked with keywords such as: fear. They like to use that one. It seems if they can evoke that feeling in anyone it can drive motivation or psychotherapy. I think they are going for the last option but mostly they don't tell you anything except that if you want to change to got to figure out why. Well, I'm not sure they say that because if they did, no one would read any of their articles because then you could figured out the best way to get yourself to do anything. Once you figure out why, you have all the motivation you need even if the reason is to have more fun.

I had some fun yesterday while in hibernation all day. I didn't read or think or miss a single thing.
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Then it was cold

The cold weather blew in the way it was predicted. It's January and there will be no escaping a few of these chilling days when the weather buts the gotcha on me. I'm not a cold weather person.The phrase, I don't care for it, is putting it mildly. I don't like the tingly feeling running up my arms or the numb fingers as the blood seems to disappear from my fingers. I don't care for the dry throat I experience when I'm running or especially the constant drip of my nose. What am I supposed to do with that drip. It's disgusting aside from being uncomfortable as the breeze chaps my face.

But the dipping cold is here for the entire weekend. I will need to take myself to the gym to get that run done. It won't be a passing thought if I don't dwell and make it really worse that it is. It isn't that bad and besides, what could be better than a weekend at home.
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Be Reasonable

When lost items are turned in at work, we send emails before giving it over to security. Yesterday a note went out that a shirt had been found in the parking garage. Not long after that a note that a make-up bag with eye drops and floss was found. These are ordinary items that would not be ordinarily misplaced if that person wasn't taking on a different routine. A shirt or makeup bag lost might mean someone is using the gym and packed these otherwise left-at-home items. A new routine or plan put into place while rushing to get that plan done may have led to losing certain items.

My last post was about rushing. I wrote it fast because I thought I needed to hurry and put something down. I had only a mere 4 minutes remaining before I needed to leave for work. Four minutes was all the time I thought I had to get it done. It wasn't enough time and even though I managed, it certainly wasn't enough time to decide I needed an adjustment to my plan about things I was doing. Not yet anyway and not after so brief and forced a moment.

Here is an opportunity to give myself and those poor people at work losing shirts and floss a break from all the rushing. This is not a four minute sprint into every new thing that needs to get done. The only adjustment needed so far is a little more thought in how speedy I really need to be to get to my objectives. It can be slowed down a bit. There will be time to get it done and I know it's going to be more than four minutes.

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Adjustments in Order

Rush...seems to be the name of the game.

Hurry and wait until you can get to the next thing. I can't do that now because I need to be there. I can't work on this because, well, I need to work on that. Try to rearrange the times and you find yourself not in the mood at that time. Am I ever in the mood? Or is it a ploy to procrastinate something that doesn't want to be worked on or merely being tired from having to rush and wait until it fits into the plan.

Time to rearrange the plan.
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Mini-Steps

It's been a great time off with the holidays but it's time to return to the routine of work. I managed to take advantage of my last free day yesterday to take down all the holiday decorations and get the house back in regular order. The floors are clean and so is the kitchen and refrigerator. Laundry is all folded and put away which left me with the afternoon to head and out enjoy the 75 degree weather with a 4 miles run in the neighborhood.

I will be re-reading one of my completed short stories. It is about 18000 words and I want to start editing so I will need to make notes. It will take a fresh perspective and I already have some ideas how to change up the first few pages. Then I can delve into all the chapters. I will see how much I can accomplish in the next few days. I will need to see what I think after I've completed the reading and then brainstorm how to pull it apart and put it back together. New outlines will be on the agenda, I'm sure, to keep myself on track but that might be next week.

We shall see...mini-steps being taken here.
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Get Specific

I wrote my short list. I figured out some mini-steps. Good start.

Now I need to take a look and see when I will carry these out. What will be the actual time of day I will take a mini-step. What days of the week is best to do it? I think smaller is better. I have more times on the weekend but a larger chunk that is missed is harder to make up than small bits during the week when I have less time. Spread it out. Make it small and keep it simple. I'm not going for any olympic effort but just a small adjustment.

I'm figuring it out. I'm writing specifics down. I can see how they work out after this week. I can keep doing something small for a week. It won't be that hard, it won't take much time, and it will be fun. It will be something to look forward to doing.

Can I do it? Will I?
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A Fun Year

So what if I was to say that 2017 is going to be amazing!

Doesn't that make you feel great even if it's only for an instant before you turn on your skepticism? Admit that reading that first sentence gave you a moment of optimism. It's affirmative and positive, confident and encouraging. Those are good things. So don't turn on the negative just yet. This year is going to be amazing.

I know because I am not stopping with a statement. It will not only be a sentence I happened to write at the beginning of a new year. It will be a starting point, a place to instigate and initiate the things that will turn this year into whatever I decide to make of it and why wouldn't I want it to be amazing.

How do I know this? Simply because I can plan and decide. The first thing to do is to simply decide what you want to do. Think about it, make a short list, write it down. Just put whatever you think about and don't worry about whether they are do-able or not. Look at what you have and then break each item down into small steps of how you might be able to get them done. Don't make it hard. These should be mini-steps to keep it fun. You are wanting to do these things so they should be enjoyable.

Decide to proceed with your mini-steps. Try them out. See how they work. Decide when you will revisit your list. Decide what is working and what needs to change in order to make it work better. Stay with it. Remember it's suppose to be fun.

What if a few or even one of these things worked. Wouldn't that make you happy? You would be pleased, glad, and even cheerful. Let that moment stay with you. It's encouraging, and upbeat and can make other things seem brighter or less disagreeable.

Isn't that amazing? You are worth a few minutes to think about what you want. It could be fun.
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