It seems I've made up my mind and will be working on a few goals. Yesterday seems to have been the turning point where I decided I needed to stop floundering around and I needed to make some plans of action for myself instead.
I decided I am going to do more formal training for my running. I will pull down some training plans and can modify and go from there. It isn't as if I don't have a few plans somewhere and there are more available everywhere. It's a matter of getting them in front of me and following it. I'll need to search up some races that I might officially enter. I've been avoiding that for a long time now. Somehow, even though I was running the same distances on my own I couldn't get myself to enter the official races for the same distances. I'll need to push myself through on that one and maybe I'll figure out why I have been holding back.
I need to make some calls and maybe get a little more advise on the cookie ideas. I seem to be wavering on my decisions on that. It's easy to push this to the back burner since it isn't hurting anything to stay as it is now. But it is on my list. I won't ignore it.
My fiction writing. I had intentions of sitting for an hour or more yesterday. I didn't make it happen. That is the plain and simple truth. I need to get my goals straight on this one. It might be the toughest thing to figure out because it's myself I'm fighting against and I can be stubborn.
I have some things to do. I have more plans to make. Some things might happen sooner than others but I am glad to be in the position to want to challenge myself and it helps that I feel like I want to take it on.
TT
Monday, April 30, 2012
Sunday, April 29, 2012
My gosh!
My gosh! With all my attention on the goal of running 100 miles this month, I wasn't paying attention to the goal my Nike+ sensor site was keeping track for me. After I went out this morning and slapped down another few miles (I've hit 110 for this month) I sync'd up my runs and the site gave me this welcome surprise.
My gosh! I've just been color-coded from blue to purple. 1549 more miles and I'll make black.
TT
My gosh! I've just been color-coded from blue to purple. 1549 more miles and I'll make black.
TT
Only a card
A pulled a tarot card today just because the fancy struck me. It wasn't premeditated and I wasn't thinking anything about it when I thought I would unwrap my deck from the silk it is tied in and remove a single card. I loosened the knot and moved the ends of the cloth away exposing the cards. I thumbed along the side of the deck until I was a few cards down, stopped, and pulled one out. Since all backs were showing I held the silk and deck in my left hand as I lifted my selected card up in my right as I turned it over so I could see it.
Oh, I grinned a wicked smile as I saw the face of my card. Two wicked smiles were then staring face to face back at each other. I pulled the devil.
You might think that wouldn't be a good way of starting a day or the week. Oh, no! Shake my head and tremble. This cannot be good. But there is a certain amount of devil that needs to show up every once in a while in order to push past the regular and the safe. There is a portion of fire that needs to be behind the eyes and burning in your insides to move to the bigger and better. You see, the devil card suggests a risk-taker. A reminder that sometimes you need to laugh in the face of limitations. Have you ever met an under-confident devil? Do you think he second-guesses himself at every turn? Doesn't he go out to do whatever it is he wants like he can do no wrong?
I think I need to think about that fire I have inside for the things I know I want to do but keep holding myself back on. It's time for a little more risk-taking. I need to build on the embers of those passions I have but keep moving away from.
It is time to start more official training for a distance run. I already had my eye on an August half marathon - since I am known for my love of warmer temperatures and it's called The Hottest Half. I will see about that - possibly something before August. And then a longer distance.
I am seriously thinking of putting that shopping cart on the cookie site. I'll take my chances and see how it develops. I won't know unless I try. And then there is one more tough and sensitive area I can't seem to stop the inner flames on no matter how hard I try to stomp it out. I'm going to work on and finish that first draft of the fiction I have been putting aside forever. I had mentioned to Jay last night that I wanted to spend an hour or more today working on it. It came out of my mouth before my brain could stop me and then here I am this morning, like the devil, taking risks and facing limitations. I'm thinking about plans and goals and how I can get from here to there. I am making my mind up to start taking those first few steps knowing that they will count as miles if I have my direction.
Some crazy fancy struck me to pull a tarot card this morning. I'm shaking my head, but it's left me with a very good, very positive, wicked smile.
TT
Oh, I grinned a wicked smile as I saw the face of my card. Two wicked smiles were then staring face to face back at each other. I pulled the devil.
You might think that wouldn't be a good way of starting a day or the week. Oh, no! Shake my head and tremble. This cannot be good. But there is a certain amount of devil that needs to show up every once in a while in order to push past the regular and the safe. There is a portion of fire that needs to be behind the eyes and burning in your insides to move to the bigger and better. You see, the devil card suggests a risk-taker. A reminder that sometimes you need to laugh in the face of limitations. Have you ever met an under-confident devil? Do you think he second-guesses himself at every turn? Doesn't he go out to do whatever it is he wants like he can do no wrong?
I think I need to think about that fire I have inside for the things I know I want to do but keep holding myself back on. It's time for a little more risk-taking. I need to build on the embers of those passions I have but keep moving away from.
It is time to start more official training for a distance run. I already had my eye on an August half marathon - since I am known for my love of warmer temperatures and it's called The Hottest Half. I will see about that - possibly something before August. And then a longer distance.
I am seriously thinking of putting that shopping cart on the cookie site. I'll take my chances and see how it develops. I won't know unless I try. And then there is one more tough and sensitive area I can't seem to stop the inner flames on no matter how hard I try to stomp it out. I'm going to work on and finish that first draft of the fiction I have been putting aside forever. I had mentioned to Jay last night that I wanted to spend an hour or more today working on it. It came out of my mouth before my brain could stop me and then here I am this morning, like the devil, taking risks and facing limitations. I'm thinking about plans and goals and how I can get from here to there. I am making my mind up to start taking those first few steps knowing that they will count as miles if I have my direction.
Some crazy fancy struck me to pull a tarot card this morning. I'm shaking my head, but it's left me with a very good, very positive, wicked smile.
TT
Saturday, April 28, 2012
There again
Last Saturday afternoon I posted after a run when I completed seven consecutive days of running. I felt like I managed to get myself back on track for the month as far as miles. I also had pushed myself to stay consistent by not letting up on a day off during that seven day time frame. It was a form of discipline in order to get to a goal. A little rugged, a little tough, more than I would usually do but I felt it was necessary for me to do it. To myself. I wouldn't have urged anyone else to follow suit but for me, it was acceptable. I ended up running 34 miles that week in total. That is way over my normal average, especially the average I have had in the recent past with my lack of consistency that brought on this whole self-prescribed method of discipline.
So it's another Saturday and I haven't run 34 miles this week and I brought down the numbers of days I've run down to five. That was/is my originally prescribed amount of runs I have wanted to get in for my weekly routine. I took my two rest days this week and I had to push myself out the door yesterday afternoon but I wasn't really fighting it all that hard not to go and I did go out and had a good run. I had another especially good one this morning.
So last Saturday afternoon I got a week long of runs and many miles done. And now today, this Saturday morning I can say I got another goal I wanted to get done.
I've run 102 miles this month.
There. Again.
TT
So it's another Saturday and I haven't run 34 miles this week and I brought down the numbers of days I've run down to five. That was/is my originally prescribed amount of runs I have wanted to get in for my weekly routine. I took my two rest days this week and I had to push myself out the door yesterday afternoon but I wasn't really fighting it all that hard not to go and I did go out and had a good run. I had another especially good one this morning.
So last Saturday afternoon I got a week long of runs and many miles done. And now today, this Saturday morning I can say I got another goal I wanted to get done.
I've run 102 miles this month.
There. Again.
TT
Friday, April 27, 2012
Be reasonable
At the moment I am not really sitting here at my desk writing. No. What I am actually doing right now is trying to convince myself that I am not really too tired to go out for a run. I'm not really trying to distract myself from going out to run by sitting upstairs in front of my laptop instead of going out for a short run. Sure I'm not.
Yes. I know it's the end of the week. Yes. I know it's been tough. Yes. I know I'm always having a hard time about now and, yes, I can find so many reasons that would seem reasonable to say...oh what the heck...what's the big deal about missing one run? Yes, yes, yes.
So what is the deal about missing one run? If it isn't a big deal than why miss it? Would I miss my run if I missed it? I think I would.
I gotta go. There doesn't seem to be any reasonable reason for missing my run that I would miss if I missed it. Don't make me explain. That would be unreasonable.
TT
Yes. I know it's the end of the week. Yes. I know it's been tough. Yes. I know I'm always having a hard time about now and, yes, I can find so many reasons that would seem reasonable to say...oh what the heck...what's the big deal about missing one run? Yes, yes, yes.
So what is the deal about missing one run? If it isn't a big deal than why miss it? Would I miss my run if I missed it? I think I would.
I gotta go. There doesn't seem to be any reasonable reason for missing my run that I would miss if I missed it. Don't make me explain. That would be unreasonable.
TT
Questing
On my quest for inspiration and trying to unjumble the small sphere of my particular world right now I decided I had to find an old quote. I didn't find the exact one I was looking for but that is sometimes a good and better thing that can happen to me when I go out questing. It's the things I find that are different from what I think I am looking for that always opens my eyes and helps me find my way.
It seems of late I have been suffering from...here is where I would need to add a long list of bullet pointed items to cover it all. I'm not even sure I need to go back and try to recollect all the things I have been suffering from. And the word suffering is probably too strong. It makes it sound like something physical or even worse - something totally mental is going on and it's more of a healthy combination. If suffering can be healthy.
I guess it might depend on my attitude since it wasn't really suffering to begin with. But, anyway, I've strayed terribly and so here is the quote I found while searching for another that I didn't.
It seems of late I have been suffering from...here is where I would need to add a long list of bullet pointed items to cover it all. I'm not even sure I need to go back and try to recollect all the things I have been suffering from. And the word suffering is probably too strong. It makes it sound like something physical or even worse - something totally mental is going on and it's more of a healthy combination. If suffering can be healthy.
I guess it might depend on my attitude since it wasn't really suffering to begin with. But, anyway, I've strayed terribly and so here is the quote I found while searching for another that I didn't.
Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing.
Benjamin Franklin
It's a tough one. I know. It could certainly hold someone like me back about writing since I don't always know that what I write is worth the reading. Maybe my problem is the other part in that I haven't thought what I have been doing is worth writing about. Then, wait, if I think about this realistically, this spot has always been my way of searching the avenues to find my way to better writing. My practice ground, it is my place to keep practicing in order to get to a better place with my writing. And sometimes I just happen to do a few things that are worth writing about. A few. It helps with the inspiration and the questing.
And so then, going back to my earlier mention - what is an artist without suffering? And the fact that I have been busy and only had 900 calories yesterday does that mean I am also starving? I mean since artists are supposedly better when they are suffering and starving. (I don't really think so...but it makes for better marketing).
And so then, going back to my earlier mention - what is an artist without suffering? And the fact that I have been busy and only had 900 calories yesterday does that mean I am also starving? I mean since artists are supposedly better when they are suffering and starving. (I don't really think so...but it makes for better marketing).
Besides, I had to do something here. I mean really. I was so very tired of seeing that last post up for so long!
TT
Sunday, April 22, 2012
Book consumption
Books are something I don't know what I would do without. I can't even imagine what would happen to me if I didn't have a book. Don't make me think about that, it would be too hard and too crippling for me. That is how bad it would be.
I finished a book recently that had been suggested to me and I read it. That is normal procedure for me. If someone suggests a book I will pick it up and give it a go. I am the "Mikey" from the Life Cereal commercial of books. Give it to Mikey...he'll eat it, Hey Mikey! He likes it! Give it to Tessa...she'll read it. But you must know beforehand that sometimes she doesn't like it and then the person that suggested the book will hear about it (if they bring it up). That was the case when a friend at work suggested I read a certain book. I gave it a go and didn't like it. It happens to be a trilogy and I told my friend that the first book ended just where it should have for me. I didn't need to read the other two. She looked at me with eyes aghast and jaw dropping down and could not believe I wasn't the least bit curious about what would happen in the next books. Didn't I want to read the next one? Didn't I want to see if it got better or where the story might go? I had to tell again that, no, it ended perfectly with the first book ...because it had ended and it was over (for me)! Hey, I gave it chance. I read the entire book (hating it all the way) and then it was done and so was I.
What happened after finishing that book was that I didn't have another book picked out and ready to read. I had no idea what I wanted to read next to cleanse my reading palate. I was hoping for new suggestions and put out an absent minded request and I actually got two new books to read! I started the first and thoroughly enjoyed it. I was told it is a series of thirteen and I was ready to start the next. I was ready to pick up the next in the series but I had the other suggested book that I felt I needed to read before delving into the thirteen book series so I started that one. Then what happened next was another friend offered me a book she had just finished reading. We had talked about it a few weeks ago and said she would bring it to me. Then another friend....yes, another book. I guess I was giving off I really, really, strong, I need a good book to read vibe because now (that I am ready to start this really good thirteen book series) I have all these other books that seem to be waiting for me. I can't even complain about it because this is so much better than not knowing what book to pick up next. And when I get through all these other books I will still have the thirteen book series that I know I will enjoy.
Then there is that original friend that has finished the second book of the really bad trilogy. She still wants me to read the second book even knowing that I absolutely hated the first.
"I never said I hated it. I told you all the reasons I didn't think it was any good."
"Oh, come on. It was all over your face!"
Oh, well, it's hard for me to hide that. But if she actually talks me into reading the second of the really awful book trilogy she will know it will be a hate read. That would be reading the book only to be able to say how much I really hated it afterward with authority.
But what would I do without books? I would starve.
TT
I finished a book recently that had been suggested to me and I read it. That is normal procedure for me. If someone suggests a book I will pick it up and give it a go. I am the "Mikey" from the Life Cereal commercial of books. Give it to Mikey...he'll eat it, Hey Mikey! He likes it! Give it to Tessa...she'll read it. But you must know beforehand that sometimes she doesn't like it and then the person that suggested the book will hear about it (if they bring it up). That was the case when a friend at work suggested I read a certain book. I gave it a go and didn't like it. It happens to be a trilogy and I told my friend that the first book ended just where it should have for me. I didn't need to read the other two. She looked at me with eyes aghast and jaw dropping down and could not believe I wasn't the least bit curious about what would happen in the next books. Didn't I want to read the next one? Didn't I want to see if it got better or where the story might go? I had to tell again that, no, it ended perfectly with the first book ...because it had ended and it was over (for me)! Hey, I gave it chance. I read the entire book (hating it all the way) and then it was done and so was I.
What happened after finishing that book was that I didn't have another book picked out and ready to read. I had no idea what I wanted to read next to cleanse my reading palate. I was hoping for new suggestions and put out an absent minded request and I actually got two new books to read! I started the first and thoroughly enjoyed it. I was told it is a series of thirteen and I was ready to start the next. I was ready to pick up the next in the series but I had the other suggested book that I felt I needed to read before delving into the thirteen book series so I started that one. Then what happened next was another friend offered me a book she had just finished reading. We had talked about it a few weeks ago and said she would bring it to me. Then another friend....yes, another book. I guess I was giving off I really, really, strong, I need a good book to read vibe because now (that I am ready to start this really good thirteen book series) I have all these other books that seem to be waiting for me. I can't even complain about it because this is so much better than not knowing what book to pick up next. And when I get through all these other books I will still have the thirteen book series that I know I will enjoy.
Then there is that original friend that has finished the second book of the really bad trilogy. She still wants me to read the second book even knowing that I absolutely hated the first.
"I never said I hated it. I told you all the reasons I didn't think it was any good."
"Oh, come on. It was all over your face!"
Oh, well, it's hard for me to hide that. But if she actually talks me into reading the second of the really awful book trilogy she will know it will be a hate read. That would be reading the book only to be able to say how much I really hated it afterward with authority.
But what would I do without books? I would starve.
TT
Saturday, April 21, 2012
There
Saturday afternoon - 4:23pm
Today was my last day of the I have to run every day for seven consecutive days from last Sunday until today because I, well I, because I, I thought I just had to do it that way thing, that thing I came up with last week. That thing I thought up in my head because it was the middle of the month and I felt like I had slacked off from running so I was going to prove to myself that I had to do it this way. Because I wasn't going to allow myself to get away with not taking advantage of putting more miles in this month than last and I wouldn't let myself talk myself out of it and I put the rules down and I wouldn't think of not doing it because I had to do it. So starting last Sunday, April 15 through today, April 21, I have managed to run every day for the past seven days. Every day, no excuses, no but I'm tireds, no I have to do this insteads, no, because like I said before - seven days. Because.
So here is how it turned out.
Sunday - 8.18 miles
Monday- 5.21
Tuesday - 4.14
Wednesday - 5.02
Thursday - 4.04
Friday - 3.60
Saturday - 4.10
It's a total of 34.29 miles for the seven days. You can tell I was getting tired toward the end of the week but I got out there. The first week in April I totaled 26.33 miles and the second week was 17.19 (the slacker week). For the month, so far, it's been a total of 77.81 miles, 14 runs, total time of 14:03:27 (no, I'm not fast by any means- especially on tired days) and 6592 calories burned. And? So? I did what I should have done. I'm back on track. I did what I set out and followed my own rules and didn't make excuses. I'm not necessarily proud or accomplished or thinking any more about it than...yeah...good. About time. There.
The month isn't over.
TT
Today was my last day of the I have to run every day for seven consecutive days from last Sunday until today because I, well I, because I, I thought I just had to do it that way thing, that thing I came up with last week. That thing I thought up in my head because it was the middle of the month and I felt like I had slacked off from running so I was going to prove to myself that I had to do it this way. Because I wasn't going to allow myself to get away with not taking advantage of putting more miles in this month than last and I wouldn't let myself talk myself out of it and I put the rules down and I wouldn't think of not doing it because I had to do it. So starting last Sunday, April 15 through today, April 21, I have managed to run every day for the past seven days. Every day, no excuses, no but I'm tireds, no I have to do this insteads, no, because like I said before - seven days. Because.
So here is how it turned out.
Sunday - 8.18 miles
Monday- 5.21
Tuesday - 4.14
Wednesday - 5.02
Thursday - 4.04
Friday - 3.60
Saturday - 4.10
It's a total of 34.29 miles for the seven days. You can tell I was getting tired toward the end of the week but I got out there. The first week in April I totaled 26.33 miles and the second week was 17.19 (the slacker week). For the month, so far, it's been a total of 77.81 miles, 14 runs, total time of 14:03:27 (no, I'm not fast by any means- especially on tired days) and 6592 calories burned. And? So? I did what I should have done. I'm back on track. I did what I set out and followed my own rules and didn't make excuses. I'm not necessarily proud or accomplished or thinking any more about it than...yeah...good. About time. There.
The month isn't over.
TT
Waking
I brewed some fresh coffee and I could hear as it began gurgling it's goodness. The aroma came after and I grabbed my favorite brown mug and held it close to the machine as if the proximity alone would somehow transfer the liquid from one receptacle to the other. Then I didn't have to wait any longer. I poured it from one container to mine and it was. Mine. Fresh, hot, strong, aromatic. It was Saturday morning!
TT
TT
Friday, April 20, 2012
Or what?
In the midst of juggling multiple duties at work I have been very single-visioned on this entire week of running seven consecutive days. I have been wearing blinders to keep my focus on the task of making sure I don't skip out on a single day of running since this past Sunday. I think when I started out I might have been giving myself what was supposed to be some self-inflicted punishment for slacking off the week before and possibly the week before that. I think I was giving myself an ultimatum. Do it this way, run every day to make up miles you failed to do earlier - or, or, what? What was my 'or what'? I got as far as this is what I am going to do but didn't figure out if I didn't do it...then what? I didn't fill in that blank. I didn't let myself know what the consequences might be if I didn't finish the plan.
Maybe that was the plan. I wasn't going for an 'or what' outcome. I wasn't giving myself the option to not do what I had set out for myself. It wasn't a punishment, it was a way to accomplish what I wanted to get done. It isn't like I didn't know what I was trying to do.
It is pretty clear in my mind. I want to reach 100 miles this month after hitting 75 miles last month. I want to up my running days each week. I just plain and simply want to get out there.
And the 'or what' factor? That was never an option. It was never I can't run today because I have this to do, or that thing that happened prevented me from getting a run in. I've had plenty of those. I decided it simply. If I got home late I'm still going out for a run, or if this had been planned I can move it to another day. Wearing blinders and being single-visioned can sometimes work out to be beneficial. It's helped me all this week to hit five consecutive running days with two left to go this week.
Why think I wasn't going to do it? There was never any 'or what'.
TT
Maybe that was the plan. I wasn't going for an 'or what' outcome. I wasn't giving myself the option to not do what I had set out for myself. It wasn't a punishment, it was a way to accomplish what I wanted to get done. It isn't like I didn't know what I was trying to do.
It is pretty clear in my mind. I want to reach 100 miles this month after hitting 75 miles last month. I want to up my running days each week. I just plain and simply want to get out there.
And the 'or what' factor? That was never an option. It was never I can't run today because I have this to do, or that thing that happened prevented me from getting a run in. I've had plenty of those. I decided it simply. If I got home late I'm still going out for a run, or if this had been planned I can move it to another day. Wearing blinders and being single-visioned can sometimes work out to be beneficial. It's helped me all this week to hit five consecutive running days with two left to go this week.
Why think I wasn't going to do it? There was never any 'or what'.
TT
Thursday, April 19, 2012
Circus or science
I am a little distracted and uber focused all at the same time. I know, two extremes and I've managed to hold possession of both at the same time. I'm sure if I did a little research there would be some medical paper written about it. They would outline all the possible symptoms, tell you what you should take for it and then list the multiple side effects from the medication that outnumber the problem itself. I'm not much interested in the diagnosis, the medical reports, or the medication. I'm too distracted to read anything like that and it isn't the object of my focus.
Somewhere, at some point, I got extremely busy. I not exactly sure when it all started to creep in but I seem to be in the middle of quite a few things going on to the point I am actually shuffling things I need to do to make time for other things to do. I've put some things aside. I've jumped things up to the top of the list and then moved them back down again to make room for something else. My priorities are starting to feel like a circus act and are wondering what hoop they need to jump through next. If only it were that simple. I'm the one that has to figure out the order of the hoops! And oh look, I left those two off to the side.
It doesn't help that I go off into my visual imagination like that. Not really. Well, maybe it helps a little. I'm a little indecisive about it all. It might have something to do with having lot's to do. Maybe I need a small break. Wonder if there is a circus in town? Or maybe I should go with the multi-side effect medication. Nah!
TT
---------------
Yes - Ran yesterday. That was day four of the seven day consecutive run week. Three days to go! Whew!
Somewhere, at some point, I got extremely busy. I not exactly sure when it all started to creep in but I seem to be in the middle of quite a few things going on to the point I am actually shuffling things I need to do to make time for other things to do. I've put some things aside. I've jumped things up to the top of the list and then moved them back down again to make room for something else. My priorities are starting to feel like a circus act and are wondering what hoop they need to jump through next. If only it were that simple. I'm the one that has to figure out the order of the hoops! And oh look, I left those two off to the side.
It doesn't help that I go off into my visual imagination like that. Not really. Well, maybe it helps a little. I'm a little indecisive about it all. It might have something to do with having lot's to do. Maybe I need a small break. Wonder if there is a circus in town? Or maybe I should go with the multi-side effect medication. Nah!
TT
---------------
Yes - Ran yesterday. That was day four of the seven day consecutive run week. Three days to go! Whew!
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
So far
I went out and did another 4 miles yesterday. I am not giving myself any options out this week. I am going to run every day this week no matter what. Yes, yes...same ole tune as yesterday. It's easy to talk big that way when it's only been three consecutive days of running. Everyone has heard it all before - big talk...and where is the action?
But I'm not just talking so far. Monday and Tuesdays are possible rest days and I didn't falter there. I didn't keep myself from running by using that as a reason to skip out. I would have over 17 miles this week if I didn't have to forfeit Sunday's 8 mile run to last week. But 9 so far isn't bad and it has cut into the 25 I need to reach by Saturday. Of course the following week I'll have another 25 to hit the 100 for the month but one week at a time. One day at a time. One run...
Well, I'm not going to think too hard about the miles and the distances. It's just about the running. And yes - as Anonymous mentioned in a comment yesterday that if I did an ultra I would be done with the 100 miles in a day maybe two...well, an ultra runner I am not. So far. Got a lot more miles to pack under my belt before that would ever be something I could even think about. But great big shout outs and high fives to you, Anonymous. I know your beatin' down the scrubs and trails and pathways out there. Keep it up and I'll do my small part here this way for now. It seems to be working out for me this way so far.
TT
But I'm not just talking so far. Monday and Tuesdays are possible rest days and I didn't falter there. I didn't keep myself from running by using that as a reason to skip out. I would have over 17 miles this week if I didn't have to forfeit Sunday's 8 mile run to last week. But 9 so far isn't bad and it has cut into the 25 I need to reach by Saturday. Of course the following week I'll have another 25 to hit the 100 for the month but one week at a time. One day at a time. One run...
Well, I'm not going to think too hard about the miles and the distances. It's just about the running. And yes - as Anonymous mentioned in a comment yesterday that if I did an ultra I would be done with the 100 miles in a day maybe two...well, an ultra runner I am not. So far. Got a lot more miles to pack under my belt before that would ever be something I could even think about. But great big shout outs and high fives to you, Anonymous. I know your beatin' down the scrubs and trails and pathways out there. Keep it up and I'll do my small part here this way for now. It seems to be working out for me this way so far.
TT
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Miz consistency
I made up my mind that I can't miss a single day of running this week. No rest days, no days off, just a week of consistent runs. They don't all have to be long or many miles but I have to run every day. For this week. I let last week get away from me and only had three runs. Three runs! Out of a total of seven days and I only ran three? That isn't a good number, sorry, but no. There can be good excuses...appointments, scheduling problems, household a/c upsets but no. That was last week and this is Tuesday of the week I will be running every day. I already covered Sunday and Monday so it's just ticking off each day from now on until the week is over on Saturday. And I am hell-bent that I am going to do it.
I managed to hit 50 miles for the month on Sunday but that cut into my number of miles for this week in order to hit 100 by the end of the day on 4/30/12. That's the goal. 100 mile for this month. I am not even thinking about the 75 miles anymore. That isn't an option for stopping. It's 100 or nothing, brother. That's the way it's gonna play and I'll be barreling through until I get there. No stopping, no days off, it's running all the way until I get what I get. I even had a reminder from my nike+ site that I had hit 1500 miles since using my sensor and I only needed 49 more to change from my color blue to purple (It's a mile achieved color-coding system for everyone on the site). 49 miles...what a considence it would line up with what my goal is this month! It's been a long haul to get here and I'll be hauling myself out every day this week.
Wow. Hang on just a moment. I wonder what I'll be saying by Thursday evening? I might need some encouragement by then so please keep me in mind...some of my bravado might have worn thin by then and I might need a pick me up.
Keep runnin'!
TT
I managed to hit 50 miles for the month on Sunday but that cut into my number of miles for this week in order to hit 100 by the end of the day on 4/30/12. That's the goal. 100 mile for this month. I am not even thinking about the 75 miles anymore. That isn't an option for stopping. It's 100 or nothing, brother. That's the way it's gonna play and I'll be barreling through until I get there. No stopping, no days off, it's running all the way until I get what I get. I even had a reminder from my nike+ site that I had hit 1500 miles since using my sensor and I only needed 49 more to change from my color blue to purple (It's a mile achieved color-coding system for everyone on the site). 49 miles...what a considence it would line up with what my goal is this month! It's been a long haul to get here and I'll be hauling myself out every day this week.
Wow. Hang on just a moment. I wonder what I'll be saying by Thursday evening? I might need some encouragement by then so please keep me in mind...some of my bravado might have worn thin by then and I might need a pick me up.
Keep runnin'!
TT
Sunday, April 15, 2012
On track?
Today gave true meaning to the word 'work-out' (word? hyphenated two words?). It was tough! I pushed too long and had to squeeze every last ounce of gumption to finish. I had a sneakin' suspicion that five miles was all I could take today so that is what I set my sensor for - five miles. But I knew I needed 8 miles. I needed 8 miles to have 50 for the month so I would be on track to have 100 by the end of the month. I should have had the 8 yesterday since Saturday is the end of my week but I didn't make it yesterday. I had to close out the week with only 17 miles instead of 25. So today is the 15th - mid-month - so I had to get 8 miles to make 50 - mid-month - to be on track. That is even though I am actually behind for last week with today catching that up but then that would mean I have no miles yet for this week. It sort of makes sense (in my mind anyway) so let's leave it at that.
Sure enough, I hit five miles and was getting pooped. If I had been on that tv show the Biggest Loser it would have been one of those scenes where the participant is red-faced and sweating while barely taking baby steps and threatening to stop while the equally red-faced trainer is screaming at the top of their lungs for them to keep it up while foaming spit escapes from their angry mouths. I would be the loser in this scenario, you see, because I felt like I was taking baby steps. But I kept going. I had to push through it and it was truly a workout. Not easy. Of course, going that slowly gave me time to think and I know why the energy level was so low. Aha! Yes. I use all these tools to monitor myself, don't I? Who needs an angry trainer when I can prove to myself exactly whats going on.
I knew the past two days my calories were below 1200. Yesterday was 1163 (including three lite beers) and the day before was only 882 (and I also ran that day). According to my tool, along with my minimum 1200 calories a day I should hit at least 85% of 60 grams of protein a day and 150 grams of carbohydrates. Yesterday I only hit 109 grams of carbs and the day before was only 24 grams of protein. Pretty glaring missteps. Two weak days of nutrition equals really hard workout?! Kind of a no-brainer, don't you think? I will need to adjust. Obviously.
So it was a tough work-out today but I'm on track and know what to do to fix it. I have the tools and the analysis and the crazy imagination about snarling trainers spewing spittle at me so I should be good.
I'm on track. That's a great way to start the week. On track.
TT
Sure enough, I hit five miles and was getting pooped. If I had been on that tv show the Biggest Loser it would have been one of those scenes where the participant is red-faced and sweating while barely taking baby steps and threatening to stop while the equally red-faced trainer is screaming at the top of their lungs for them to keep it up while foaming spit escapes from their angry mouths. I would be the loser in this scenario, you see, because I felt like I was taking baby steps. But I kept going. I had to push through it and it was truly a workout. Not easy. Of course, going that slowly gave me time to think and I know why the energy level was so low. Aha! Yes. I use all these tools to monitor myself, don't I? Who needs an angry trainer when I can prove to myself exactly whats going on.
I knew the past two days my calories were below 1200. Yesterday was 1163 (including three lite beers) and the day before was only 882 (and I also ran that day). According to my tool, along with my minimum 1200 calories a day I should hit at least 85% of 60 grams of protein a day and 150 grams of carbohydrates. Yesterday I only hit 109 grams of carbs and the day before was only 24 grams of protein. Pretty glaring missteps. Two weak days of nutrition equals really hard workout?! Kind of a no-brainer, don't you think? I will need to adjust. Obviously.
So it was a tough work-out today but I'm on track and know what to do to fix it. I have the tools and the analysis and the crazy imagination about snarling trainers spewing spittle at me so I should be good.
I'm on track. That's a great way to start the week. On track.
TT
Saturday, April 14, 2012
Layout is just wrong
I'm not sure what is going on with the layout of this blog. I'm not sure if you are viewing it any differently than it appeared before but I am. My posts should all be to the left under the header and all my gadgets, archives, pictures and such should all be to the right of the post. I've had it that way for a long time. But not now. I didn't do anything to change it but now when I view my blog all my widgets and gadgets and pic's are underneath all the posts. That's not where they are supposed to be! They are supposed to be to the right not underneath or at the bottom.
I tried to go into the dashboard and template and see if something had changed. Nothing had changed. Now what?
I went in and tried to go back to the default template. I tried to narrow it down to what it could possibly be to have changed it so I could change it back. I went into blogger help to search what was up and the only thing I could find was that I might possibly need to adjust the margins. So I did. I tried. But somehow I can't seem to get the layout back in proper order with posts to the left and all the rest to the right. It just won't happen.
Now I've got some funky colors going on and font is different (that's no big deal) but I lost my snippet that says so much~...the one that says...
I tried to go into the dashboard and template and see if something had changed. Nothing had changed. Now what?
I went in and tried to go back to the default template. I tried to narrow it down to what it could possibly be to have changed it so I could change it back. I went into blogger help to search what was up and the only thing I could find was that I might possibly need to adjust the margins. So I did. I tried. But somehow I can't seem to get the layout back in proper order with posts to the left and all the rest to the right. It just won't happen.
Now I've got some funky colors going on and font is different (that's no big deal) but I lost my snippet that says so much~...the one that says...
This is my tool. * It became a discipline for my writing.
I never know where my thoughts will take me. My ideas
come from my everyday, good or bad, but always unexpected.
That shouldn't be at the bottom of the page after scrolling past old posts! It needs to be up at the top right hand corner...where it lives. It wasn't planning a move...who evicted it?!
I'll do more research to see about getting things back to normal. It isn't right and I can't leave it this way. It's been driving me a little more batty than usual (hush, now).
Besides...that snippet says it all. Doesn't it?
TT
Friday, April 13, 2012
Secret
Don't tell anyone.
I left work at noon yesterday to keep an appointment with the air conditioning service people to finish the last bit of wiring they had to do on our brand new unit. We had the entire contraption replaced from the old 18 plus year old model to a new energy efficient heat pump. It all sounds wonderful and it is except old unit/new unit, old wiring/new wiring isn't cooperating the way it should. I don't understand all the lingo but simply put we had four wires in the old model and the new has five. Somehow these five wires have to go from the unit that is inside (upstairs no less) to the unit outside (down the stairs, cross the living room, through the kitchen, out the back door, around the deck to the side of the house).
I don't think they are doing it right but that's my opinion and they were supposed to finish yesterday. They did. During the afternoon I was able to log-in to work from home and get some things done while they trooped up and down the stairs and out the door and back again. Then they said they were finished but they wanted to show me and we started upstairs. There is a box that all the wires feed into. Check. If the power is out for more than an hour we need to press this button. Okay. But wait...not done. Then we need to go outside, remove the side of the unit there and press that button. What? If the power goes out for more than an hour I need to re-boot? At both places? I was so tired already, from the amount of work I have (why do you think I was working from home instead of just taking the afternoon off) and all these appointments with estimates and then installation, I just let them go. I lost my internet connection on my work laptop and it was almost 5:00pm by then so I just shut it all down.
I called Jay. He had a fit. He demanded the A/C peoples phone number.
I've missed almost an entire week of runs so, as tired and worn out as I was, I decided I would head out. Get out, clear my head and do something positive. I was really going slow starting out. I knew I was beat, but the weather felt great and I felt good to finally be out there. Then as I got to mile one, at that place where I first turn and hit the rocky gravelly area, I did it again. BAM! No. But yes. I felt myself going down and I knew. I tried to soften my fall as best I could and took much of the impact with the heels of my hands. And it hurt and I sat there for a while but finally got up and started walking. My eyes filled up with tears and I was acting like a little baby. I pulled out my phone as if to call someone so I would stop and buck up but, well, there was no one to call that wanted to talk to me, especially since I knew I was being totally irrational. I knew that. No big deal, I thought. I'm not hurt just tired and frustrated.
I'm getting rid of these new shoes and buying a different pair. This new technology isn't working out for me with the supposed, front balance for my faster shoes or the new energy efficient five wires for my a/c. I know soon enough it will all pass. The heels of my hands will heal. I can't believe I fell again.
But don't tell anyone.
TT
I left work at noon yesterday to keep an appointment with the air conditioning service people to finish the last bit of wiring they had to do on our brand new unit. We had the entire contraption replaced from the old 18 plus year old model to a new energy efficient heat pump. It all sounds wonderful and it is except old unit/new unit, old wiring/new wiring isn't cooperating the way it should. I don't understand all the lingo but simply put we had four wires in the old model and the new has five. Somehow these five wires have to go from the unit that is inside (upstairs no less) to the unit outside (down the stairs, cross the living room, through the kitchen, out the back door, around the deck to the side of the house).
I don't think they are doing it right but that's my opinion and they were supposed to finish yesterday. They did. During the afternoon I was able to log-in to work from home and get some things done while they trooped up and down the stairs and out the door and back again. Then they said they were finished but they wanted to show me and we started upstairs. There is a box that all the wires feed into. Check. If the power is out for more than an hour we need to press this button. Okay. But wait...not done. Then we need to go outside, remove the side of the unit there and press that button. What? If the power goes out for more than an hour I need to re-boot? At both places? I was so tired already, from the amount of work I have (why do you think I was working from home instead of just taking the afternoon off) and all these appointments with estimates and then installation, I just let them go. I lost my internet connection on my work laptop and it was almost 5:00pm by then so I just shut it all down.
I called Jay. He had a fit. He demanded the A/C peoples phone number.
I've missed almost an entire week of runs so, as tired and worn out as I was, I decided I would head out. Get out, clear my head and do something positive. I was really going slow starting out. I knew I was beat, but the weather felt great and I felt good to finally be out there. Then as I got to mile one, at that place where I first turn and hit the rocky gravelly area, I did it again. BAM! No. But yes. I felt myself going down and I knew. I tried to soften my fall as best I could and took much of the impact with the heels of my hands. And it hurt and I sat there for a while but finally got up and started walking. My eyes filled up with tears and I was acting like a little baby. I pulled out my phone as if to call someone so I would stop and buck up but, well, there was no one to call that wanted to talk to me, especially since I knew I was being totally irrational. I knew that. No big deal, I thought. I'm not hurt just tired and frustrated.
I'm getting rid of these new shoes and buying a different pair. This new technology isn't working out for me with the supposed, front balance for my faster shoes or the new energy efficient five wires for my a/c. I know soon enough it will all pass. The heels of my hands will heal. I can't believe I fell again.
But don't tell anyone.
TT
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
What happened to next year?
We weren't going to spend any money on large improvements to the house this year. We did many things just this past November and December to the house to upgrade, improve and make it better. We were both happy with all the things we did and it looks much better for doing it all. This year we agreed that there would be no large expenditures to be thought up because once we get into that remodeling mode it's easy to find other things and projects to take on to make things better. We were supposed to stop.
Obviously, we failed at stopping. It started out as a simple annual check-up of the air conditioning unit. A simple check this, check that, write a check for $69.95 and you are set for another year. That was the way I naively thought it was going to go. It didn't. Yes. I did write a check for $69.95 but that wasn't the end of it. Freon. Leak. Same as last year but now it's more expensive for the freon and it cost even more to find the leak and then replace whatever needs replacing on such an old unit. I was going to have them add freon because I was still of the mindset of no big expenditures this year. Yes. I realized a band-aid instead of surgery probably wasn't going to go very far but it was only needing to hold out for a year. At least in my mind that was the way it would work. It would hold for a year. But that didn't happen.
So then came the parade of estimates...four in all...to replace the entire A/C inside and out from the ancient, broken-down, leaking machine to a brand new heat pump, energy something or other machine. Expensive. Not cheap. Then look...while part of the parade was going on someone noticed the calcification on the water heater. The old, how-old-is-that-thing that is starting to leak water heater. More estimates. Plumbers join the parade of high-priced papers being filled out and left on my kitchen table to be used as high-blood pressure devices while going throught them all. After all the days of appointments and tramping through the house and being told of this option and that labor and that price and this the stack of estimates was becoming a blur. All the while I want to hold on to the idea of next year...none of this was supposed to happen until (well, I hadn't thought about it happening at all) but at least not until next year.
But now it's all done. Finished. New water heater and new A/C heat pump. Shiny, new, expensive and all done this year not next. An extra year of enjoyment. The house is shivering with excitement.
But please excuse me...I have some bills to pay.
TT
Obviously, we failed at stopping. It started out as a simple annual check-up of the air conditioning unit. A simple check this, check that, write a check for $69.95 and you are set for another year. That was the way I naively thought it was going to go. It didn't. Yes. I did write a check for $69.95 but that wasn't the end of it. Freon. Leak. Same as last year but now it's more expensive for the freon and it cost even more to find the leak and then replace whatever needs replacing on such an old unit. I was going to have them add freon because I was still of the mindset of no big expenditures this year. Yes. I realized a band-aid instead of surgery probably wasn't going to go very far but it was only needing to hold out for a year. At least in my mind that was the way it would work. It would hold for a year. But that didn't happen.
So then came the parade of estimates...four in all...to replace the entire A/C inside and out from the ancient, broken-down, leaking machine to a brand new heat pump, energy something or other machine. Expensive. Not cheap. Then look...while part of the parade was going on someone noticed the calcification on the water heater. The old, how-old-is-that-thing that is starting to leak water heater. More estimates. Plumbers join the parade of high-priced papers being filled out and left on my kitchen table to be used as high-blood pressure devices while going throught them all. After all the days of appointments and tramping through the house and being told of this option and that labor and that price and this the stack of estimates was becoming a blur. All the while I want to hold on to the idea of next year...none of this was supposed to happen until (well, I hadn't thought about it happening at all) but at least not until next year.
But now it's all done. Finished. New water heater and new A/C heat pump. Shiny, new, expensive and all done this year not next. An extra year of enjoyment. The house is shivering with excitement.
But please excuse me...I have some bills to pay.
TT
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Was that you?
I took a rest day from running yesterday. I had some regular chores to catch up on at home and since I have a rest day choice of Monday or Tuesday I went ahead and took yesterday off. I also have Thursday or Friday as rest day options also so I can get five runs in a week with two days off. For the three day holiday weekend I was able to run 6, 7, 8 miles for a total of 21. The best part is I am feeling great! I've been getting back to feeling good and itchy if I don't go out for a run, even if it's short. Like last night...in the middle of doing a load of laundry I wanted to scoot out the door but I kept to my rest day mindset. Besides the laundry wasn't going to put itself into the dryer.
I was sitting outside at lunch yesterday at work and a friend came out briefly to my table. He said he had a meeting but saw me there and wanted to ask if I ran along this particular street?
"Yes."
"I thought that was you."
Now I'm a little nervous. I'm always a little taken aback when someone says they have seen me running. Like I think I'm invisible or anonymous when I'm out there running. So I asked him, "Did you see me running after work?" Somehow I thought it would make me feel better if it was a random sighting when he happened to be driving home.
"After work, on weekends, I see you all the time! You run a lot!"
He had to go on to his meeting. I was left thinking I didn't think I was running that much but maybe I have been. I've wanted to increase it and maybe I actually have. I was nervously left thinking how many times had he seen me?
He was gone for a while while I tried to get back to my lunch. But then a thought entered my head on what I should have asked him. Maybe I should have asked, how many times are you up and down that street?
TT
I was sitting outside at lunch yesterday at work and a friend came out briefly to my table. He said he had a meeting but saw me there and wanted to ask if I ran along this particular street?
"Yes."
"I thought that was you."
Now I'm a little nervous. I'm always a little taken aback when someone says they have seen me running. Like I think I'm invisible or anonymous when I'm out there running. So I asked him, "Did you see me running after work?" Somehow I thought it would make me feel better if it was a random sighting when he happened to be driving home.
"After work, on weekends, I see you all the time! You run a lot!"
He had to go on to his meeting. I was left thinking I didn't think I was running that much but maybe I have been. I've wanted to increase it and maybe I actually have. I was nervously left thinking how many times had he seen me?
He was gone for a while while I tried to get back to my lunch. But then a thought entered my head on what I should have asked him. Maybe I should have asked, how many times are you up and down that street?
TT
Monday, April 9, 2012
Easter Menu
We had everyone over to the house yesterday. It was a quickly planned menu (Saturday night on the phone with Sonny) with no idea of what we would cook. It was finally decided to make things easy and go with a marinara sauce with fresh, homemade pasta and breaded veal and chicken cutlets.
It was scrumptious. It was an afternoon of coloring eggs, cooking, drinking some wine and laughing. Mr. L tried to stay awake the entire time even though he was desperately fighting sleep. The activities were just too much for him to miss, I guess, even though he is just over three months old and needed his nap.
The menu was simple.
Nothing too fancy but all fresh and not too difficult. Ended it all, of course, with some chocolates.
Happy Easter!
TT
It was scrumptious. It was an afternoon of coloring eggs, cooking, drinking some wine and laughing. Mr. L tried to stay awake the entire time even though he was desperately fighting sleep. The activities were just too much for him to miss, I guess, even though he is just over three months old and needed his nap.
The menu was simple.
Homemade Pesto on toasted Ciabatta Slices
Cooked Spinach and Feta Cheese on Puff Pastry Squares
Veal Parmiagiana
Chicken Parmiagina
Homemade egg-noodle Pasta
Homemade Marinara Sauce
Nothing too fancy but all fresh and not too difficult. Ended it all, of course, with some chocolates.
TT
Sunday, April 8, 2012
It's late
I know. It's late. For me. To be here. Upstairs in the PM instead of the earliest of AMs like my norm. But all is quiet. The lights are out. The kitchen is as back to order as I will attempt to take care of it for now and I somehow wandered upstairs after everyone left.
What a great day. A holiday. Easter Sunday. Which I started much the same way I am ending it. Quietly, here. While it is dark outside.
The boys came over. And Selma and the boys...the little boys and the big boys. We cooked. Fresh pasta with veal and chicken parmigiana both. Earlier it was fresh pesto and ciabatta. Crisp and flavorful. Wine, red...Pinot Noir, Sangiovese Di Tuscana, Chiati, Merlot....Prosecco. We don't skimp. On the wine or the food. It's family but no. No. It's all fresh, fresh, homemade. I have pictures but not now.
It's about all of it. All together. Having much but not too much. Having enough and lot's of it the best. That's the way we do it. We don't know another way.
And I get this precious slice of time. Late. For me. To be here. After all of lot's of the best.
TT
Happy Easter.
What a great day. A holiday. Easter Sunday. Which I started much the same way I am ending it. Quietly, here. While it is dark outside.
The boys came over. And Selma and the boys...the little boys and the big boys. We cooked. Fresh pasta with veal and chicken parmigiana both. Earlier it was fresh pesto and ciabatta. Crisp and flavorful. Wine, red...Pinot Noir, Sangiovese Di Tuscana, Chiati, Merlot....Prosecco. We don't skimp. On the wine or the food. It's family but no. No. It's all fresh, fresh, homemade. I have pictures but not now.
It's about all of it. All together. Having much but not too much. Having enough and lot's of it the best. That's the way we do it. We don't know another way.
And I get this precious slice of time. Late. For me. To be here. After all of lot's of the best.
TT
Happy Easter.
1000
I am not going to hold out about what the 1000 is all about for effect. I am not going to say who would have thought or what can I say. I won't say that if someone had told me way back in 2010 that this would happen I never would have believed it for a single moment. So since I am not going to build this up and make it more than it is... than this is it... 1000 Posts.
I have to say that I know myself fairly well and I know I would have argued this point back when I started and thought how utterly ridiculous and impossible this would be. I would have laughed and waved my hand in a dismissive way to indicate how far fetched I thought getting here would be. It would have been such a crazy notion, I wouldn't have given it a second thought. And truthfully, until just a few days ago, I don't think I believed it was even close to really happening. I certainly wasn't watching for it and then when I happened to glance at what it displayed I couldn't argue any more, I couldn't wave it away. I was looking right at the numbers and even as bad as I am with math, even I can calculate these simple numbers. Besides, it was staring me right in the face already totaled up.
None of it really means anything. It's not earth shattering. It isn't anything that will help anyone. It's more a curiosity and an, 'oh, look at that', type of thing and then forget about it except that it's there. It's real. I didn't make it up and it wouldn't have gotten there if I hadn't been behind it all.
I guess it's no big deal since as soon as I publish this it will be done and I'll go on to another and the inner odometer will click over to a new number. But it seems unbelievable to me. The one that would have argued that it couldn't, wouldn't possibly happen as I invisibly try to wipe it away with a wave of my hand.
1000 posts? Really?
Who would have thought? What can I say?
TT
I have to say that I know myself fairly well and I know I would have argued this point back when I started and thought how utterly ridiculous and impossible this would be. I would have laughed and waved my hand in a dismissive way to indicate how far fetched I thought getting here would be. It would have been such a crazy notion, I wouldn't have given it a second thought. And truthfully, until just a few days ago, I don't think I believed it was even close to really happening. I certainly wasn't watching for it and then when I happened to glance at what it displayed I couldn't argue any more, I couldn't wave it away. I was looking right at the numbers and even as bad as I am with math, even I can calculate these simple numbers. Besides, it was staring me right in the face already totaled up.
None of it really means anything. It's not earth shattering. It isn't anything that will help anyone. It's more a curiosity and an, 'oh, look at that', type of thing and then forget about it except that it's there. It's real. I didn't make it up and it wouldn't have gotten there if I hadn't been behind it all.
I guess it's no big deal since as soon as I publish this it will be done and I'll go on to another and the inner odometer will click over to a new number. But it seems unbelievable to me. The one that would have argued that it couldn't, wouldn't possibly happen as I invisibly try to wipe it away with a wave of my hand.
1000 posts? Really?
Who would have thought? What can I say?
TT
Friday, April 6, 2012
Pocket full of diamonds
I have been trying hard to find something that can be elusive when you need it and powerful when you have it. It can sometimes make the difference between giving up or mustering up enough to keep going. It can apply to simple tasks or difficult undertakings. It's motivation.
For a while I seemed to have misplaced mine somewhere. It had fallen away and I didn't know where to look for it. Maybe I thought I didn't need it. Maybe I had taken it for granted and when I thought I could just pull it out like spare change it just wasn't there anymore. I struggled. But I wouldn't let it go. I couldn't.
I read articles, I took surveys, I narrowed down what I was trying to do. I zeroed in on what it was I wanted to accomplish. I found when you are just starting something and because of the unknown there can be quite a lot of information that can motive you to get started. The old saying of 'every journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step' can truly help put things into perspective. But what if it isn't your first step? What if you are 1500 or 3000 or 10000 steps into your journey? What if you are 1400 miles into your journey? While I was looking it seemed as if I found myself standing in the middle of the trail looking forward down the path and then looking back from where I came. There was no one up ahead and no one back behind. I was standing in the center all alone. Why was I there? As I stood there with my hands in my pockets the sun shifted ever so slightly. It shone down on the dusty, uneven trail where I was standing and exposed small glimmers shining from places hidden all around. They were like diamonds winking at me from behind and ahead. I pulled my hand out of my pocket and uncurled my fist to find a few small gems gleaming there. Small prizes I had picked up along the way and forgotten. But some I had not picked up. Some had been given to me. Small gems of encouragement. A question of interest, a sharing of experience, a simple word.
Motivation is all around when you figure out what you need it for and recognize it when it's given. It's like shining diamonds along the journeys trail. They hide under the dust and in our own pockets when we don't know why we are there. It sometimes just takes time to re-focus on what we are trying to accomplish to find it again.
When I did refocus I began to see the other footprints in that path where I stood in the middle looking back and forward. I had pockets full of valuables that had been given to me when I thought I had been standing there alone. It was that question someone asked, or the sharing of an experience, or the simple encouraging word someone gave to me.
Valuable stuff.
TT
----------------------------------
I really meant it about being 1400 miles into my journey...
For a while I seemed to have misplaced mine somewhere. It had fallen away and I didn't know where to look for it. Maybe I thought I didn't need it. Maybe I had taken it for granted and when I thought I could just pull it out like spare change it just wasn't there anymore. I struggled. But I wouldn't let it go. I couldn't.
I read articles, I took surveys, I narrowed down what I was trying to do. I zeroed in on what it was I wanted to accomplish. I found when you are just starting something and because of the unknown there can be quite a lot of information that can motive you to get started. The old saying of 'every journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step' can truly help put things into perspective. But what if it isn't your first step? What if you are 1500 or 3000 or 10000 steps into your journey? What if you are 1400 miles into your journey? While I was looking it seemed as if I found myself standing in the middle of the trail looking forward down the path and then looking back from where I came. There was no one up ahead and no one back behind. I was standing in the center all alone. Why was I there? As I stood there with my hands in my pockets the sun shifted ever so slightly. It shone down on the dusty, uneven trail where I was standing and exposed small glimmers shining from places hidden all around. They were like diamonds winking at me from behind and ahead. I pulled my hand out of my pocket and uncurled my fist to find a few small gems gleaming there. Small prizes I had picked up along the way and forgotten. But some I had not picked up. Some had been given to me. Small gems of encouragement. A question of interest, a sharing of experience, a simple word.
Motivation is all around when you figure out what you need it for and recognize it when it's given. It's like shining diamonds along the journeys trail. They hide under the dust and in our own pockets when we don't know why we are there. It sometimes just takes time to re-focus on what we are trying to accomplish to find it again.
When I did refocus I began to see the other footprints in that path where I stood in the middle looking back and forward. I had pockets full of valuables that had been given to me when I thought I had been standing there alone. It was that question someone asked, or the sharing of an experience, or the simple encouraging word someone gave to me.
Valuable stuff.
TT
----------------------------------
I really meant it about being 1400 miles into my journey...
Food hangover
I was trying to figure out what had been wrong with me this past Wednesday. The week starting Tuesday had been stressful to say the least and now looking back I would have to say I was probably suffering from a food hangover. What? Never heard of that? I know what you're thinking. Where does she come up with these crazy ideas? It might be rare but I do believe it is a certifiable condition. Okay, maybe I am the one that is certifiable but anyway...
It all started this past week. I survived it but the repercussions still had left me with what was feeling like a mild hangover. The worst part of it all is that I didn't even have the pleasure of getting drunk. I didn't even have one drink! Okay, I actually had one beer on Wednesday after it all happened but only one!
I have been watching my nutrition for the past five weeks. Yes. I have been very aware of the health police and have made excellent choices during that time. I've been eating clean and fresh and keeping my proteins, carbs and calories all in nice, neat, little proper compartments for five weeks. That's long enough to make a difference and I've done an excellent job to managing my food and making above-par choices. Then came Tuesday. The afore mentioned day from Hades. Work that day became beyond do-able. Let's just say it is almost impossible to finish an accurate report that people are still inputting information into 30 minutes before you are supposed to be finished and then attend the meeting to discuss that report. So my entire morning was lost. Then it was 1:00, my regular lunch time, but I had to go to the meeting and the meeting took the entire hour. So it's after 2:00 before I get to eat.
Normally, a delay in lunch wouldn't have made much of a difference. But it might have been due to the great way I have been handling my food intact lately. It might have been the 10 mile run on Sunday and the three on Monday that had me STARVING on that Tuesday afternoon a little after 2:00. The stress of the morning didn't help. So I ate my lunch. And then I went to the vending machine and ate the trail mix it popped out when I deposited my coins. Then I went back to my desk and ate my apple.
Once I got home dinner couldn't be cooked fast enough. Pot roast, potatoes, carrots, doesn't cook quick enough, so how about a sandwich to hold me over? Hmmm, what is there...multi-grain bread, turkey meat, tomato...pile it on and shove it down my gullet. Now, it's becoming a feeding frenzy. What's in the cabinet...!? Oh, no...hitting the cookie ingredients...always an all-time low...walnuts, chocolate chips, dried cherries. If you rationalize it, it sounds like your own trail mix...pour portions out onto a paper napkin, mix together and grab handfuls - hand to mouth, gumb, garb, grump. Pretty ugly picture. And then of course, dinner, meat that is fork tender, potato, sweet carrots, sop up that gravy with an extra sourdough roll. Swirl the bread around so the plate is completely clean. Lick, munch, tear the bread, swirl it once more then into the mouth. Close your eyes, chew, and then look down for more.
Needless to say...when I finally stopped and entered the entire day in my food journal it was pretty embarrassing and the numbers where astronomical. It was like I was an addict and hadn't had a drink in years and fell off the wagon and rolled down the street. You would think I would have noticed when I hit the street but, ouch, to allow myself to keep on rolling in the dust...embarrassing. Hang my head in utter mortification.
It didn't help when it was all over and the next day I was miserable. I felt like I had a food hangover. It was that lurking, hazy feeling of being almost immobile and knowing I had done it to myself. I am no longer equipped to handle the amounts I was forcing into myself in such a short period of time. It wasn't a pleasant feeling. It lingered through most of the day but I'm back to normal now.
I know it's about balance. I know if I am going to run long and hard I need to up my intake with the proper nutrients. I know what they are. But things like this are going to happen. It's the lesson you take away when it does. I'm over my hangover. I know better. But sometimes, when you are in the moment, you think just a little bit more isn't going to hurt and then a little bit more. You think that it could actually help and then Bam! Then it does. It hurts.
Yeah, I know, certifiable.
TT
It all started this past week. I survived it but the repercussions still had left me with what was feeling like a mild hangover. The worst part of it all is that I didn't even have the pleasure of getting drunk. I didn't even have one drink! Okay, I actually had one beer on Wednesday after it all happened but only one!
I have been watching my nutrition for the past five weeks. Yes. I have been very aware of the health police and have made excellent choices during that time. I've been eating clean and fresh and keeping my proteins, carbs and calories all in nice, neat, little proper compartments for five weeks. That's long enough to make a difference and I've done an excellent job to managing my food and making above-par choices. Then came Tuesday. The afore mentioned day from Hades. Work that day became beyond do-able. Let's just say it is almost impossible to finish an accurate report that people are still inputting information into 30 minutes before you are supposed to be finished and then attend the meeting to discuss that report. So my entire morning was lost. Then it was 1:00, my regular lunch time, but I had to go to the meeting and the meeting took the entire hour. So it's after 2:00 before I get to eat.
Normally, a delay in lunch wouldn't have made much of a difference. But it might have been due to the great way I have been handling my food intact lately. It might have been the 10 mile run on Sunday and the three on Monday that had me STARVING on that Tuesday afternoon a little after 2:00. The stress of the morning didn't help. So I ate my lunch. And then I went to the vending machine and ate the trail mix it popped out when I deposited my coins. Then I went back to my desk and ate my apple.
Once I got home dinner couldn't be cooked fast enough. Pot roast, potatoes, carrots, doesn't cook quick enough, so how about a sandwich to hold me over? Hmmm, what is there...multi-grain bread, turkey meat, tomato...pile it on and shove it down my gullet. Now, it's becoming a feeding frenzy. What's in the cabinet...!? Oh, no...hitting the cookie ingredients...always an all-time low...walnuts, chocolate chips, dried cherries. If you rationalize it, it sounds like your own trail mix...pour portions out onto a paper napkin, mix together and grab handfuls - hand to mouth, gumb, garb, grump. Pretty ugly picture. And then of course, dinner, meat that is fork tender, potato, sweet carrots, sop up that gravy with an extra sourdough roll. Swirl the bread around so the plate is completely clean. Lick, munch, tear the bread, swirl it once more then into the mouth. Close your eyes, chew, and then look down for more.
Needless to say...when I finally stopped and entered the entire day in my food journal it was pretty embarrassing and the numbers where astronomical. It was like I was an addict and hadn't had a drink in years and fell off the wagon and rolled down the street. You would think I would have noticed when I hit the street but, ouch, to allow myself to keep on rolling in the dust...embarrassing. Hang my head in utter mortification.
It didn't help when it was all over and the next day I was miserable. I felt like I had a food hangover. It was that lurking, hazy feeling of being almost immobile and knowing I had done it to myself. I am no longer equipped to handle the amounts I was forcing into myself in such a short period of time. It wasn't a pleasant feeling. It lingered through most of the day but I'm back to normal now.
I know it's about balance. I know if I am going to run long and hard I need to up my intake with the proper nutrients. I know what they are. But things like this are going to happen. It's the lesson you take away when it does. I'm over my hangover. I know better. But sometimes, when you are in the moment, you think just a little bit more isn't going to hurt and then a little bit more. You think that it could actually help and then Bam! Then it does. It hurts.
Yeah, I know, certifiable.
TT
What else
What an exhausting week! Or it sure seemed that way when I was in the middle of it all. Tuesday was from Hades, or the fiery pit, or let's just say it, it was a day from Hell. It's burning talons continued to smoulder and reach into the rest of the week. It did. I have the burn marks to prove it. Oh, wait. Maybe they've faded already.
I have so much to catch up on now. Here. At home. But there is a big difference. I get to do it here. On my own, at my own pace. My pace at the moment is just getting up (what two hours later than normal-almost three)? I have coffee, fresh brewed, black and hot. I'm looking out of my upstairs window and seeing myself starting out my run. No hurrying to get to work, no working on the project that deadlines keep jumping in my face, no, no, none of that. I'm putting that aside.
It's time for free time. Sure, there are things I need to do but no requirements, no expectations, no pressure. This is time for head clearing and coffee drinking and a turn around the neighborhood. And that is just the first part of the morning.
Then, who knows what else might be in store?
TT
I have so much to catch up on now. Here. At home. But there is a big difference. I get to do it here. On my own, at my own pace. My pace at the moment is just getting up (what two hours later than normal-almost three)? I have coffee, fresh brewed, black and hot. I'm looking out of my upstairs window and seeing myself starting out my run. No hurrying to get to work, no working on the project that deadlines keep jumping in my face, no, no, none of that. I'm putting that aside.
It's time for free time. Sure, there are things I need to do but no requirements, no expectations, no pressure. This is time for head clearing and coffee drinking and a turn around the neighborhood. And that is just the first part of the morning.
Then, who knows what else might be in store?
TT
Monday, April 2, 2012
In a month
Here I am finding myself in April. The entire first quarter of this year is now in the past. I am feeling quite good, if I'm allowed to say that. I took hold of myself at the end of February and decided to make some changes that have now seemed to have taken hold in many positive ways. Before then I was stuck in routines and had fallen into some habits that didn't play well with me even though I continued to do them. I had gained a few extra pounds, I wasn't following any type of exercise routine, I wasn't doing any really productive or creative things. I was allowing myself to get away with being placid and somewhat lazy because it was easier to whine about not doing this or that instead of taking the action and doing the this or that that needed to be done.
A lot has happened in that one months time from then to now. I made up my mind. That was step one. Just deciding to fix myself and flip that switch was step one. After months of following a bad routine it wants to stick so changing it isn't always so easy. I knew it was going to be tough so I searched ways (yes - my tools) to help. I found those tools and used them the best way I could to my advantage. That was step two. So I was at the point of making up my mind and then finding tools to help. Step three was doing it. You would think that would be step one but it isn't always. I've skipped the first two steps many times and it doesn't work. I have to flip that switch to make up my mind first. I knew I was in a place where I needed extra motivation to do it and that is where the tools came in. Then the only thing left was to start doing what I wanted to do.
Since February 29th when I started I dropped 7 pounds. I also ran many miles and I am working toward what I was really going for which is running more consistently each week. I've done a bunch in a month. I took hold and I am feeling quite good.
I think I'm allowed to say that. What's to come in another month?
TT
A lot has happened in that one months time from then to now. I made up my mind. That was step one. Just deciding to fix myself and flip that switch was step one. After months of following a bad routine it wants to stick so changing it isn't always so easy. I knew it was going to be tough so I searched ways (yes - my tools) to help. I found those tools and used them the best way I could to my advantage. That was step two. So I was at the point of making up my mind and then finding tools to help. Step three was doing it. You would think that would be step one but it isn't always. I've skipped the first two steps many times and it doesn't work. I have to flip that switch to make up my mind first. I knew I was in a place where I needed extra motivation to do it and that is where the tools came in. Then the only thing left was to start doing what I wanted to do.
Since February 29th when I started I dropped 7 pounds. I also ran many miles and I am working toward what I was really going for which is running more consistently each week. I've done a bunch in a month. I took hold and I am feeling quite good.
I think I'm allowed to say that. What's to come in another month?
TT
Sunday, April 1, 2012
New month
Hello April!
It would be classic for me to turn this into one of my bits of fiction today. It would be classic because for the past two years I have taken this day as an opportunity to write up a piece of imagination as if it were true and post it here. Then at the end I would say...no, it isn't true, that didn't really happen, I just made it all up because it's April Fools Day. Well, I decided I wouldn't do that this time. I'm going to keep it nice and normal and real.
I have to say I am still feeling really good about hitting my goal of 75 miles logged in March. At the beginning of the month I was struggling desperately with my motivation. I just couldn't break through the cloudy mist holding be back. It was all myself, of course, but that doesn't make it any easier. Then when I hit my first goal of 50 miles somewhere along March 24th I knew I had a full week to get another 25 miles in to make the 75. I can't say what propelled me forward, to drive myself, to give it a shot, but whatever it was I did it. And it feels great. And I look at my numbers and feel great. And that is all true.
But here it is April. A new month. A new start of the week and what am I doing? I've already missed the best part of my running day. I've already sat here all morning being lazy and unmotivated and what do they say? resting on my laurels of my running past? only being as good as my last batch of numbers? acting as if I'm some kind of running diva that has done it all? No run today. Not a single mile, not a single step, never went outside the house. Okay, okay. So I've been having coffee and wasting time! So I've been sitting and thinking about last month! So I've missed the morning! It's only April 1st! It's April 1st.
April Fools...
Let me recount, retract, that last paragraph. Nope. Starting with "But here it is April" and until "April Fools..." all of that is untrue. A lie. A fib. A joke.
Yes - here is the truth about today - this morning. I went out already and had a run. I didn't stay inside and miss the morning being lazy and unmotivated. Nope. Are you kidding? It's a new month, it's April 1st. I went out and logged a few miles to start out the new month. I went out and ran 10 miles. I don't know. Not a bad start to a new month!
Hello April (running) Fool!
TT
--------------------------------------------
Here are the April Fool post links from years past...
April 1, 2010
April 1, 2011
It would be classic for me to turn this into one of my bits of fiction today. It would be classic because for the past two years I have taken this day as an opportunity to write up a piece of imagination as if it were true and post it here. Then at the end I would say...no, it isn't true, that didn't really happen, I just made it all up because it's April Fools Day. Well, I decided I wouldn't do that this time. I'm going to keep it nice and normal and real.
I have to say I am still feeling really good about hitting my goal of 75 miles logged in March. At the beginning of the month I was struggling desperately with my motivation. I just couldn't break through the cloudy mist holding be back. It was all myself, of course, but that doesn't make it any easier. Then when I hit my first goal of 50 miles somewhere along March 24th I knew I had a full week to get another 25 miles in to make the 75. I can't say what propelled me forward, to drive myself, to give it a shot, but whatever it was I did it. And it feels great. And I look at my numbers and feel great. And that is all true.
But here it is April. A new month. A new start of the week and what am I doing? I've already missed the best part of my running day. I've already sat here all morning being lazy and unmotivated and what do they say? resting on my laurels of my running past? only being as good as my last batch of numbers? acting as if I'm some kind of running diva that has done it all? No run today. Not a single mile, not a single step, never went outside the house. Okay, okay. So I've been having coffee and wasting time! So I've been sitting and thinking about last month! So I've missed the morning! It's only April 1st! It's April 1st.
April Fools...
Let me recount, retract, that last paragraph. Nope. Starting with "But here it is April" and until "April Fools..." all of that is untrue. A lie. A fib. A joke.
Yes - here is the truth about today - this morning. I went out already and had a run. I didn't stay inside and miss the morning being lazy and unmotivated. Nope. Are you kidding? It's a new month, it's April 1st. I went out and logged a few miles to start out the new month. I went out and ran 10 miles. I don't know. Not a bad start to a new month!
Hello April (running) Fool!
TT
--------------------------------------------
Here are the April Fool post links from years past...
April 1, 2010
April 1, 2011
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)