"Grill Special: Build your own Chicken Beast Sandwich with side and Fountain Beverage $5.50"
This is what appeared on our Company’s' Café menu as an item being served today. I copied and pasted it directly from the source to keep the integrity of the information. I had not spotted it myself but was alerted to this phenomenon by a co-worker that asked if I had seen it posted. I had not, but thought it would be well worth the few minutes to browse the menu to see if it was true. It was definitely true! They are serving Chicken Beast!
I know our on-campus café is striving hard to use local and organic products. They spotlight items when they use local farm produce and have even brought those vendors to our site occasionally for associates to talk to and purchase fresh items from them. Although, I don't seem to recall them ever bringing in a vendor for the chicken beast.
So I couldn't help but wonder what might have happened? When did they decide this item should be rounded up for our kitchen's use? I couldn't help but wonder if a group of rebel café employees went out on the night of a full moon with torches lit to track the hoof prints of this exotic bird? Did they fling large droplets of holy water onto these fleeing beasts, filling the damp, night air with the scent of their singed feathers? What could possibly have been the temptation for them to risk scalding reprimands to bag these fiendish creatures? What caused their burning desire to go forth, capture, and serve these rare, dark-winged brutes?
I have heard that on a scale of 1 to 100 they rate a 666. I have been told that the meat has a naturally spicy, hot flavor and char-like texture. I hear the forked-tails are especially delectable if cooked slowly over a flaming, fiery grill for what might seem an eternity. I hear there is a measure of risk you take of losing a vital part of yourself at the point of sale.
There might be some skill needed if you actually intend to build your own. I have been told stories of the slithering of flesh even after it has been thoroughly cooked and the great gnashing of teeth once the sandwich is tasted. I can't imagine what their offering might be as a side. My guess would be some dastardly root vegetables that have been grown underground and very slowly roasted. And I am sure I have never heard of a fountain drink available that could quench the parched and blistered throat after partaking of this meal. I am sure if there was such a drink they would make sure to hide it and keep us in perpetual darkness. I would think the amount of suffering...
What?
Were you trying to get my attention, what?
It was….left out the "r"?
Just a typo?
Oh, how boring.
TT
I know our on-campus café is striving hard to use local and organic products. They spotlight items when they use local farm produce and have even brought those vendors to our site occasionally for associates to talk to and purchase fresh items from them. Although, I don't seem to recall them ever bringing in a vendor for the chicken beast.
So I couldn't help but wonder what might have happened? When did they decide this item should be rounded up for our kitchen's use? I couldn't help but wonder if a group of rebel café employees went out on the night of a full moon with torches lit to track the hoof prints of this exotic bird? Did they fling large droplets of holy water onto these fleeing beasts, filling the damp, night air with the scent of their singed feathers? What could possibly have been the temptation for them to risk scalding reprimands to bag these fiendish creatures? What caused their burning desire to go forth, capture, and serve these rare, dark-winged brutes?
I have heard that on a scale of 1 to 100 they rate a 666. I have been told that the meat has a naturally spicy, hot flavor and char-like texture. I hear the forked-tails are especially delectable if cooked slowly over a flaming, fiery grill for what might seem an eternity. I hear there is a measure of risk you take of losing a vital part of yourself at the point of sale.
There might be some skill needed if you actually intend to build your own. I have been told stories of the slithering of flesh even after it has been thoroughly cooked and the great gnashing of teeth once the sandwich is tasted. I can't imagine what their offering might be as a side. My guess would be some dastardly root vegetables that have been grown underground and very slowly roasted. And I am sure I have never heard of a fountain drink available that could quench the parched and blistered throat after partaking of this meal. I am sure if there was such a drink they would make sure to hide it and keep us in perpetual darkness. I would think the amount of suffering...
What?
Were you trying to get my attention, what?
It was….left out the "r"?
Just a typo?
Oh, how boring.
TT
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