I've been writing this morning. Mostly I've been writing the same things over and then over again. It can get easy to be stuck in a creative stand-still at times. It's easy to get stuck. It's not so easy to figure out why you are stuck especially when you think what you are putting down is what you thought you wanted. It started out early this morning.
I woke feeling especially good. I could hear the quiet sounds from outdoors filter in while it was still dark and everyone slept. It set a wonderful backdrop for the tranquil mood and quiet delight that was brought to the early morning. But after a while, even with my wonderful setting and surroundings, I realized I wasn't telling much of a story with what I was writing. What good was a lot of flowerly words and bountiful description if it didn't do more? Great practice, I thought, maybe. I certainly could always fall back on that way of thinking.
But I knew it wasn't ringing true - what I had been writing. It was vague and misdirected. It wasn't bad, horrible, it just didn't really say anything. I was at a pause. So I went back and tried again and it was a little better but not. So again. And then again.
There was a lot of repetition going on and the morning brightened up and I kept thinking I should go for a run. Retreat. Wave the white flag on the difficult creative stand-still and go do something I knew I could do and feel good about. Give up on the hard to deal with and lean toward the familiar routine.
And that is when the barrier dropped. It fell away and the words went beyond pretty description and said something. My stubborn nature and the especially good feeling I woke up with finally gave way to some progress. I was feeling good about writing. It was as good a feeling as some runs even if that might seem like hard things to compare. There was no need to abandon the repetitive work I had been doing because it was finally breaking through. The sheer idea of remembering what it is all about was making the difference. It is about the personal challenge. It's about pushing through when you want to give up. It's about reminding yourself how much you actually enjoy doing it. If it wasn't for that, then why?
The writing still needs some work. It's not always easy to get unstuck. But it helps to remember what it really is all about. It's about the enjoyment that can come out of the doing.
TT
Saturday, June 30, 2012
Friday, June 29, 2012
Weekend
I'm really glad it's the end of the week. I can't say it flew by and it didn't really seem longer than it was the way it seems at times. It was a regularly paced week and I'm glad it's over. Now it's time for me to do what I want on my own schedule. I seem to look forward to that more and more. I'm getting greedy about my free time.
How could anyone blame me? Is it bad to be greedy about that? Doesn't everyone wish they had more of it? Doesn't everyone want that free time where they get to make their own schedule and do things when they want to do them?
So right now, I'm feeling greedy but I'm feeling good. It's the end of the week!
TT
How could anyone blame me? Is it bad to be greedy about that? Doesn't everyone wish they had more of it? Doesn't everyone want that free time where they get to make their own schedule and do things when they want to do them?
So right now, I'm feeling greedy but I'm feeling good. It's the end of the week!
TT
One-liners about places
Jay had a friend that sent him an email with funny one-liners about places to go. Jay thought it was amusing and printed it so I could see it too. It's much the same way that Jay will find a humorous cartoon in the paper and cut it out and put on the fridge door for me to see. This email did have some funny lines and for some reason we kept the printed email to glance at to get a chuckle over every now and then. Then Jay had mentioned about two months ago that this friend was having some back problems.
Jay gets to meet some interesting people at his shop. This man was an established illusionist. He had a fairly large production with mostly stage magic. He did the big stuff. He had been doing it for many years. Before that, somewhere from the late 70's thru the mid 80's, he was the Master of Ceremonies for the traveling Austrian Lipizzaner Stallions. If you remember them, they were those majestic white horses that would perform. I remember them and it must have been thrilling to have toured center stage with such a production for so many years as this friend had.
It turned out it wasn't back problems he was having. It was an advanced and aggressive cancer that didn't leave the doctors time to do anything about. He was gone within that short time span. I never actually met him. I only know he must have been an interesting person and left me with some funny one-liners that I can still appreciate. I wish I had written them myself but I didn't. At the end of the original email he had the name (Bubba B. Johnson III) in parathesis so he might have been giving him author credits but I can't be sure. Anyway, I thought I would share them just the same...for the Master of Ceremonies and the Stage Illusionist.
I have been in many places, but I've never been in Cahoots. Apparently, you can't go alone. You have to be in Cahoots with someone.
I've also never been in Cognito. I hear no one recognizes you there.
I have, however, been in Sane. They don't have an airport; you have to be driven there. I have made serveral trips there, thanks to my friends, family and work.
I would like to go to Conclusions, but you have to jump, and I'm not too much on physical activity anymore.
I have also been in Doubt. That is a sad place to go, and I try not to visit there too often.
I've been in Flexible, but only when it was very important to stand firm.
Sometimes I'm in Capable, and I go there more often as I'm getting older.
One of my favorite places to be is in Suspense! It really gets the adrenaline flowing and pumps up the old heart! At my age I need all the stimuli I can get!
I may have been in Continent, and I don't remember what country I was in. It's an age thing.
This professional entertainer, even in his everyday, knew the importance of leaving everyone with a smile.
TT
Jay gets to meet some interesting people at his shop. This man was an established illusionist. He had a fairly large production with mostly stage magic. He did the big stuff. He had been doing it for many years. Before that, somewhere from the late 70's thru the mid 80's, he was the Master of Ceremonies for the traveling Austrian Lipizzaner Stallions. If you remember them, they were those majestic white horses that would perform. I remember them and it must have been thrilling to have toured center stage with such a production for so many years as this friend had.
It turned out it wasn't back problems he was having. It was an advanced and aggressive cancer that didn't leave the doctors time to do anything about. He was gone within that short time span. I never actually met him. I only know he must have been an interesting person and left me with some funny one-liners that I can still appreciate. I wish I had written them myself but I didn't. At the end of the original email he had the name (Bubba B. Johnson III) in parathesis so he might have been giving him author credits but I can't be sure. Anyway, I thought I would share them just the same...for the Master of Ceremonies and the Stage Illusionist.
I have been in many places, but I've never been in Cahoots. Apparently, you can't go alone. You have to be in Cahoots with someone.
I've also never been in Cognito. I hear no one recognizes you there.
I have, however, been in Sane. They don't have an airport; you have to be driven there. I have made serveral trips there, thanks to my friends, family and work.
I would like to go to Conclusions, but you have to jump, and I'm not too much on physical activity anymore.
I have also been in Doubt. That is a sad place to go, and I try not to visit there too often.
I've been in Flexible, but only when it was very important to stand firm.
Sometimes I'm in Capable, and I go there more often as I'm getting older.
One of my favorite places to be is in Suspense! It really gets the adrenaline flowing and pumps up the old heart! At my age I need all the stimuli I can get!
I may have been in Continent, and I don't remember what country I was in. It's an age thing.
This professional entertainer, even in his everyday, knew the importance of leaving everyone with a smile.
TT
Wednesday, June 27, 2012
Gym time
Well, well. I am dressed and ready for work but I DID get out of the house this morning and went to the gym. I was able to get a quick 30 minute run on the treadmill and although it felt like it was longer than 30 minutes it worked out just fine. I was back home by 6:08 with plenty of time.
I also covered my bases with Jay. I mentioned the possibility of me heading out to the gym in the early, wee hours of the morning and he agreed that wasn't a problem. He thoroughly dislikes my running outdoors at those hours but he was okay with the gym. He said so. I am not sure he even knows I went there this morning. But no matter.
I couldn't get my nikeplus droid phone application to work...or I got impatient with it and just went with my run and numbers of the treadmill. I manually entered them into the runkeeper.com application (on my phone, too) which is the one with the outside GPS system but it also gives you the capability to manually enter workouts. It has all my June runs since my iPod crashed and my nikeplus couldn't sync and I can't manually enter there. But - my new iPod is tracking from China...was in Hong Kong yesterday and still on time to be delivered to me tomorrow.
So...well, well. I need to scoot.
TT
I also covered my bases with Jay. I mentioned the possibility of me heading out to the gym in the early, wee hours of the morning and he agreed that wasn't a problem. He thoroughly dislikes my running outdoors at those hours but he was okay with the gym. He said so. I am not sure he even knows I went there this morning. But no matter.
I couldn't get my nikeplus droid phone application to work...or I got impatient with it and just went with my run and numbers of the treadmill. I manually entered them into the runkeeper.com application (on my phone, too) which is the one with the outside GPS system but it also gives you the capability to manually enter workouts. It has all my June runs since my iPod crashed and my nikeplus couldn't sync and I can't manually enter there. But - my new iPod is tracking from China...was in Hong Kong yesterday and still on time to be delivered to me tomorrow.
So...well, well. I need to scoot.
TT
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
More gadgets
I woke up this morning considering if I should go to the gym. The clock said 4:44am. I was awake. I could get myself there in no time, put in at least a 30 minute workout, and have time to come back and get ready for work. The more I thought about it the less I knew I would do it. I have these passing thoughts about sneaking out of the house at that hour when it's still dark and then getting home and Jay telling me I have some 'splaining to do. He never actually said that but sometimes I think he is thinking it. So I talked myself out of it this morning and will get out there this afternoon after work. I think we're scheduled for a high of 104 this afternoon which isn't much more than it was yesterday. (Yes - I ate lunch outside as usual).
I need to check out my new nike+ appl for droid! Selma sent me an email that announced that nike/apple FINALLY decided to offer the phone application not just for iPhones but for Android, too - for free. I have already downloaded it and tried it out by walking around the house. Then, I am expecting my new iPod nano 6th generation to arrive Thursday afternoon and then I can use either/or and both will still load my stats to my nike site that I have been using over the past two years. Well, except for anything since 6/4 when my iPod 5th generation finally was drowned in sweat and couldn't be revived even with the magic rice bag.
So I've lost some stats for this month. I'm way behind anyway for June as far as miles. I calculated I was only at 59 miles this month compared to the 100 miles I've had for each of the past two. Now I can keep them all straight again starting in July although I don't expect...
I expect I'll get myself to the gym this afternoon and get in at least a 30 minute workout. I'll get it done without having any 'splaining to do...except to myself if I don't.
TT
I need to check out my new nike+ appl for droid! Selma sent me an email that announced that nike/apple FINALLY decided to offer the phone application not just for iPhones but for Android, too - for free. I have already downloaded it and tried it out by walking around the house. Then, I am expecting my new iPod nano 6th generation to arrive Thursday afternoon and then I can use either/or and both will still load my stats to my nike site that I have been using over the past two years. Well, except for anything since 6/4 when my iPod 5th generation finally was drowned in sweat and couldn't be revived even with the magic rice bag.
So I've lost some stats for this month. I'm way behind anyway for June as far as miles. I calculated I was only at 59 miles this month compared to the 100 miles I've had for each of the past two. Now I can keep them all straight again starting in July although I don't expect...
I expect I'll get myself to the gym this afternoon and get in at least a 30 minute workout. I'll get it done without having any 'splaining to do...except to myself if I don't.
TT
Monday, June 25, 2012
A little more
I am not big on quotes or memorable references that are scattered here and there. I think the impact of what is trying to be said is lost when used alone and not put into the context of what was originally trying to be said. I think that I find most don't fair well standing alone and I want to know more about why they are being used. Maybe it's just my curious nature or maybe I'm just too opinionated. What can I do?
I DID see one yesterday that was interesting. It might have been that finally that small percentage of right quote to correct state of mind was centered but this was what it said: "A lot of good work is lost for the lack of a little more."
Now THAT made me pause. The funny part about this is that I HAD read all of the rest of the context and it really didn't apply to the way I took the quote. So maybe that blows my theory of having to need all the context to get what a quote is truly trying to get across but I never said my opinions can't change. Sure, ask me again tomorrow.
But, seriously, think about it. A lot of good work is lost for the lack of a little more. It could apply to so many things and for me - well - timing, with my struggle with my fiction it read well for me.
I've never been afraid of work. I am very much the roll up your sleeves, hit the ground running, and what are you waiting for, kind of person. For most things. But I haven't been for finishing that first draft of my fiction project. And I admit I'm fearful about it. I keep thinking that it will be just awful after all the work. But since I have no real idea if that is true or not, wouldn't it be just as likely that I could lose some good work for the lack of finishing it off? So, as easily as it is to look at what might be reasons to quit there are reasons to keep going. Am I afraid of the work? I don't think so. And, gee, surprise. I didn't talk and hash it out with anyone but figured it out on my own. Imagine that.
Better yet. Let me imagine myself rolling up my sleeves and hitting the ground running again. I've been struggling to get myself on track for a while now and maybe reading that one quote at the right time may have finally triggered a point on the positive side to keep going.
Nobody is going to be able to tell me I just couldn't get the work done. Especially if it's just a little more.
TT
I DID see one yesterday that was interesting. It might have been that finally that small percentage of right quote to correct state of mind was centered but this was what it said: "A lot of good work is lost for the lack of a little more."
Now THAT made me pause. The funny part about this is that I HAD read all of the rest of the context and it really didn't apply to the way I took the quote. So maybe that blows my theory of having to need all the context to get what a quote is truly trying to get across but I never said my opinions can't change. Sure, ask me again tomorrow.
But, seriously, think about it. A lot of good work is lost for the lack of a little more. It could apply to so many things and for me - well - timing, with my struggle with my fiction it read well for me.
I've never been afraid of work. I am very much the roll up your sleeves, hit the ground running, and what are you waiting for, kind of person. For most things. But I haven't been for finishing that first draft of my fiction project. And I admit I'm fearful about it. I keep thinking that it will be just awful after all the work. But since I have no real idea if that is true or not, wouldn't it be just as likely that I could lose some good work for the lack of finishing it off? So, as easily as it is to look at what might be reasons to quit there are reasons to keep going. Am I afraid of the work? I don't think so. And, gee, surprise. I didn't talk and hash it out with anyone but figured it out on my own. Imagine that.
Better yet. Let me imagine myself rolling up my sleeves and hitting the ground running again. I've been struggling to get myself on track for a while now and maybe reading that one quote at the right time may have finally triggered a point on the positive side to keep going.
Nobody is going to be able to tell me I just couldn't get the work done. Especially if it's just a little more.
TT
Sunday, June 24, 2012
Who's fault
What a lazy Sunday morning. I'm going to blame it on Sunday since it couldn't, no way, be me that's lazy. It has to be this day. It must be Sunday's fault that I can't organize the things that I should try to get done today and don't even want to try to think about them. It must be Sunday's fault that I haven't pulled on my running shoes and headed out for a run before the temps soar up to the high heavens. It must be the fault of the day that I've already spent so much idle time gazing out the window, leaning back in my chair, coffee mug in both hands and legs tucked up underneath me. What a lazy morning.
It can't be me.
TT
It can't be me.
TT
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