That Odd Place

Ever since the last part of December I've been doing some real training with my running. I searched all my old data, I put together some ideas, I figured out my past pitfalls and came up with ways to avoid or loophole around them. I was going to give myself the best shot at doing some mean, real training again. It's something I haven't really done in about five years. Oh sure, I've had my runs. I'll go out and run here, there, and sporadically, even regularly for a while. It will look like I'm making headway and then I'll peter out and stop. I will eventually get going again but only after some internal tongue lashing and mind abuse for not doing what I should be doing during the time I am fizzling down to nothing.

I don't want to say I'm at the point of a complete fizzle because right now it doesn't feel exactly the same. But I am finding myself at that odd point of doing some kind of avoidance to some of my runs. It occurs mostly during the week. The past couple of weeks I haven't been putting in my runs when it comes to after the workday. I've been hauling it big time on the weekends. That has to hold up for something. But what's up with my lack of motivation during the week? Normally at this point is where I would give in to the dry spells, throw up my hands, and sink in to the feeling of failure. The mind tricks of, "you see, you can't, you won't," are triggered and play devastation games.  But that hasn't happened. It's the weekend again and I've found myself trying to find ways to DO that long run even though the reoccurring reasons for NOT have invaded my mind. The bad thoughts usually go something like this: It's colder than I like. I don't want to do 12 miles on the treadmill. I don't want to run those inclines in my neighborhood.

Instead, my mind has wandered into territory to try and figure out how TO do it instead of NOT. I'd wait a little later this morning before heading out so the temps can adjust upward. I can drive myself out to the runners haven and enjoy the run up and back there, avoiding both the treadmill and my neighborhood. Before that I even tried to map a route in my neighborhood and realized it would be too much up, down, backtracking the same streets to be any kind of a good run. I am looking for ways to figure it out instead of giving up.

It's nice to find I am rejecting the can't/won't thoughts more rapidly and replacing them with alternatives. I still need to work on the regular week activities but getting over and recognizing this routine of accepting the dry spells and figuring out how to keep on from here is refreshing. Training the brain is hard but it makes the rest seem so much easier. I guess I knew it wasn't just run training this time around but a bit more brain training to get past the odd places along the way. I'm kind of liking this odd place I've found myself in lately. It's proving that sticking to the focus instead of giving in to the easy is a good place to be.
TT